Nothing kills me like you do
by Ethereal Wanderer
Summary: Sanji x Female OC Short story, taking place during the time skip. It's basically Sanji's struggle with his love for Jun (OC), who he thinks is one of Ivankov's cross-dressers. Hope you give this a chance!
1. Chapter 1

So, I was listening to Ginuwine - Pony and this sprouted into my mind:))

Ignore the grammar ans spelling mistakes! Do it!

 _Hope you enjoy!_

 **Sole** **disclaimer** **because everyone seems to be doing it: I do NOT own anything from One Piece!**

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She wouldn't have minded him thinking she was an effeminate cross dressing man, if she wasn't falling for him. Hard! And how could she not? The pirate was sweet and carrying and funny. And hot. Did she mention hot? "Black Leg" Sanji looked nothing like his wanted poster. Manly and muscular, the man was haunting her dreams since she first arrived on Momoiro Island with Iva and the rest of the Impel Down escapees.

Ah, what a fateful day that was. It started with Sanji arguing with Iva, demanding he'd be given a ship so he could return to his captain and ending up agreeing to stay and train. He kept flirting with Iva until he finally revealed he was a man. That pretty much sealed her deal. As Sanji's eyes first met her, hearts sprung in them and he kneeled at her feet, kissing her hand, demanding her name. She didn't get to respond, as the man jumped away as if burned, calling her a demon for tempting him so. At first she had no idea what she had done. Only the next day, when he called her 'too pretty to be a man' did she realize that he had placed her with the rest of Iva's crew.

In truth she was only visiting at Iva's request. The Okama King said his girls could use some _fresh meat_ to learn a thing or two from, whatever that meant. But she agreed, not like she had where to go after escaping prison. During her stay in Impel Down, Iva brought her at level 5.5 and she made friends there quickly. Her crew was killed log before that and she had no family. None that actually cared if she was dead or alive anyway. So she got on the ship with Iva after the war and Ace's death. She was depressed the entire way, but the pirates he traveled with had a way of cheering each other up. The whole thing was a disaster, but in the end Luffy got away. Shivers still ran across her spine when she remembered his scream as he was holding his brother's lifeless body. Wherever he was, Luffy was far from being alright, but hopefully he was going to recover and meet again with his crew.

Speaking of Luffy's crew, his cook was a handful to deal with. She tried countless times to explain to him that she was a woman. And she almost managed a few times, but the man was stubborn. Or maybe just traumatized, the island didn't seem to be fairing him well. As a 'lady lover', a place filled with cross-dressing men was probably a bit much for him. But wasn't that reason enough to think her a woman? Didn't he wish she was indeed a woman? She had done everything in her power to convince him, short of undressing in front of him. She even placed his hands on her breasts, but the idiot called her Satan. Maybe the fact that there were no other women there, made him stuck on the obsessive idea that she too was a man.

She was offended really. How could he think her a man? Her boobs were not enormous, but they were big enough to make men stare. Sanji's eyes darted to her chest a few times too, but he burst in tears, accusing her of being cruel to deceive men like that. She slapped him that time. He was ridiculous.

It was true that she wore dresses similar to the men there, but her legs were perfectly shaved. Not to mention shaped like a woman's. The difference was so plain to her she thought the Straw Hat pirate was messing with her. But she overheard his conversation with Carol-sama and some other candies. He was complaining about the island and stated how it had become even harder for him since 'the pretty boy' arrived. Of course, her nickname became 'Pretty boy'. None of the travesties denied her being a man in front of Sanji, enjoying his torment.

In the first week, she really didn't give a rat's ass of what the cook thought, just enjoying her stay in the island where 'those with a heart of a maiden gather'. There were some incredibly beautiful places there and not to mention funny animals. The candies were all super cute and she got along with all them. They would gather at night and tell stories. Some nights turned into embarrassing parties, where they'd get drunk and dance and share some of the more steamy experiences.

One night Sanji decided to join them. Or rather, he was forced there by Iva-chan. He stood in a corner half of the night, until Carol-sama got him drunk enough. He danced with them and spoke of his adventures with the Straw Hats, She already knew Luffy was an amazing person, but she never would've guessed all the places they've seen and all the fun they had. Sanji's crew even had a musician. How cool was that?

By the end of the night she decided he was a good guy and made a mental note not to forget to try and tell him yet again that she was a woman. It was decided that the next day no one had to work or train in Sanji's case. He lifted his cup when Iva announced his decision and downed it all in one gulp. Poor cook was wasted. As the sun was threatening to rise, the party broke and people were retreating to bed. She thought she would be the 'nice guy' and take him to his room, as she was fairly sure he wouldn't make it there on his own. She took him by the arm and dragged him slowly.

They chatted along the way, mostly about Luffy and his crazy bursts of energy. They held onto one another, walking in zigzags and stumbling onto the smallest of rocks. They laughed all the way to the front of his room. And there it happened, he cursed her with some bittersweet spell. Sanji grabbed her by the back of her head and leaned her forward, his other hand holding her waist. His lips came down, capturing hers. She thought of resisting, but drunk as she was, she kissed him back, hands gripping his shirt tightly. He bit her lover lip before breaking the kiss and looked at her with the most alluring eyes she had ever seen. The words he whispered in her ear, hot breath making her shiver, would forever plague her mind.

"The things I'd do to you if you were a woman…" With that, Sanji wished 'him' a goodnight and retreated to his room, leaving her outside, wide eyed.

"But… I _am_ a woman. Dammit!" She stormed back to her room and crashed in her bed. But his surprisingly soft lips were imprinted on hers and her skin still tingled at her waist where he had held her. Damn, stupid cook.

She wanted to confront him the next day, but, conveniently, he remembered nothing past his forth bottle of sake. He had no idea how he got to his room, nor did he recall the lap dances he received from the candies and all the stripping that occurred by the end of the night. And most importantly, he didn't even remember her being there.

That was the second and final time she slapped him. She left the dining area and struggled not to cry. She was angry and sad and a bit confused. And still a bit buzzed, since she hadn't really closed her eyes that entire night. She wondered if she hadn't hallucinated the entire scene, because she too was heavily under the influence of alcohol. But it felt too real to be a silly dream.

That whole incident happened over a week ago. She tried so hard to forget about the stupid kiss, but every time she closed her eyes, his face would be there, with his seductive eyes and his stupid swirly eyebrows. She loved those eyebrows and the way he would lift them on occasion, when he wondered about something or when he was surprised.

So she decided to tell him one last time, that she, Jun Hamasaki, was a woman.

Needless to say it went bad. She had to search for him all over the place until finally locating the stupid cook. And there he was, working out, training to defeat Iva-chan's Newkama Kenpo masters. How many had he gotten? Nine? Ten? He was working fast, determined to get back to his crew on time.

He was cladded in only some black shorts, showing his strong legs and overall muscular body. Sweat was rolling down his skin as he lifted weights. She momentarily forgot what she was doing there, mesmerized by the way his muscles flexed.

"Stop looking at me like that. It's disgusting!" It took a few seconds to realize he was talking to her, as she was the only other person there.

"What?"

"Even if I agreed to train here and wear your outfits, I still love women." He was already annoying here, but she breathed in, calming herself down.

"Sanji…"

"Don't start with that. I won't be fooled again."

"But really, I am-"

"You may be pretty, but you will never compare with Nami chaaawn and Robin swaaama. Oh how I miss my lovely ladies!" Jun felt the vein in her temple twitch, her fingers rolling into fists. "What have I done to deserve to come to this hell?" Her fist collided with his stupid mug, while he kept wining and crying for some beautiful far away women. And that was the first time she punched him.

"Hell? You want hell? Oh, you will get it, Sanji-boy." She mimicked the way Iva-chan said his name. Jun was beyond furious. She left poor Sanji on the ground, looking after her with his eyes wide and his mouth gapped. He had no idea what was awaiting him. She also had no idea, but something wicked was brewing in her mind. If he was so determined to portray her as a man, well, she about to become one irresistible 'cross-dresser'. She would wait for him at every corner and entice him with all the tricks she gathered in her short life. He was going to regret making assumptions and not listening to her. First, she needed to acquire a few things, like that strap-it dildo she saw on Carol-sama's display case. She would take her role as a man serious.

Jun was going to make Momoiro Island Sanji's personal Hell even if it killed her. Or him. May the teasing begin!

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So, this is a Prologue of sorts. Most future chapters will be from Sanji's tortured perspective.

I'll try to update weekly, but I promise nothing [ I "heart* procrastinating ]

Tell me what you guys think :3


	2. Chapter 2

I thought I should post so people won't think me dead. It's just so incredibly hot these days... I don't really mind the heat, but my laptop's keyboard gets so hot too...

Anyways, hope you enjoy!

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"A sea of whiskey couldn't intoxicate me as much as a drop of you."

\- JS Parker

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Sanji valued the few hours a day he got to spend training. Alone. Away from all the madness that was Momoiro Island. He woke up and counted the minutes until he got to leave the cross-dressers and mind his own business. He worshiped those moments of calmness because he could clear his mind, make sense of things, all the while working his body. That changed a few days back when Jun decided to ruin everything.

The pirate regretted the day he met 'Pretty boy' Jun. In truth he had no idea what he had done to insult him so badly, but there were moments when Sanji thought he hadn't done nearly enough to deserve such torture. He was stalked, everywhere he went Jun was there, with his flawless long hair and crystalline laughter.

And as if he had eyes everywhere, there he was, coming through the tree line to disturb Sanji's work out. And he had thought he had found the perfect spot, in the forest, shaded from the torrid sun and clingy transvestites. But no, Jun had to find him. Well, on his honor as a Straw Hat, he would not be intimidated and dragged in the corner by some pretty face. This time he was not going to let the damn cross-dressed affect him. His love for beautiful women was strong.

A shiver ran down his spine as Jun bent down to set up his parasol and little picnic set, just a ways away from his spot. Sanji was beginning to regret his decision to stay put and endure whatever the boy had in mind that day. Slender long legs were crossed on the small rug he had placed, tempting Sanji as the younger male searched for something in his picnic basket. Finally he pulled out a popsicle. Sanji knew what was next, Jun was keeping to is usual routine. The day before it had been bananas and the day before that, lollipops.

The cook of the Straw Hat Pirates managed to tear his eyes away from the boy while he was unwrapping the frozen snack. He tried to focus on his training. Puling the gauntlets up and letting them down became as crucial to his existence as breathing. Up and down. Inhale, exhale. Do not, for the love of all beautiful women, look up to see what that bastard is doing. And he did just as he planned. For about 2 minutes.

Jun was, in all accounts but one, flawless. The only 'wrong' thing about him was his gender. Sanji guessed that 'Pretty boy' was Ivankov 'masterpiece', the ultimate cross-dresser, capable to fool anyone. But that was not going to work on Sanji, he had already been fooled once, on his arrival to that forsaken island. No matter how perfect Jun was, he would never believe he ever was a woman.

But, even with all of Ivankov's Devil Fruit power involved, Jun was rather hard to ignore. Lean hour-glass shaped body and flowing black hair made some of Sanji favorite things in a woman. Adding the suave batting of the long, cured eyelashes and the innocent looking doe-eyes, Jun was a sight to behold. He also possessed the most alluring pair of lips Sanji had ever seen, not too big, not too small and full enough to make you wonder if they were as soft as they looked. Not that the blond pirate ever wondered about such a ridiculous thing. Never! Denial was such a sweet thing to dwell in.

'Pretty boy' was putting that mouth to good use, as he had been the past few days, as if reading the blonde's mind. The popsicle became a vulgar metaphor for something Sanji would rather not think about. Hot tongue was licking in slow, long strides at the melting ice cream. The pirate gulped hard, his mouth suddenly dry as the desert. He could swear he felt actual grains of sand in his throat.

Pouty lips wrapped the long staff and engulfed it whole. Sanji cursed at all the Sea Monsters as his dick twitched involuntarily. He looked at a spot on the ground and found a lonely bug. He focused on it up until Jun moaned softly. The sweet treat was apparently extremely good on a hot summer day. Sanji lifted his eyes and wished for the hundredth time that his eyes wouldn't find Jun.

Ice cream was tainting the corner of his mouth. He licked at it teasingly, not getting it all in one seductive try. Sanji was so lost in the view that he didn't realize that his grip on the gauntlet was loosening. Or maybe it was the way his of subconscious to scream for help, for the weight fell on his crotch. He muffled a scream while he rolled on the ground, the pain making him forget about Jun for a while. He stood there on the ground, face up towards the tree branches that obscured most of the sky.

He was definitely not gay, he couldn't be. His body was just fooled by the boy's appearance. In all truth, no man should look like Jun did. It was cruel to both him all those around. Poor boy was probably forced to become a transvestite. What woman would date a man that was more enchanting than herself? Well, there were probably some females out there willing to overlook his surreal beauty, but there were surely not many. Or maybe he wasn't even all that majestic, he wa just the closest thing to beauty Sanji could find on that blasted island. Calmed down a bit, he turned his head and cursed again.

Not sparing Sanji a glance, Jun was liking his fingers, one by one. He made a cute popping sound when each digit exited his mouth and took great care of liking everywhere. He would stop on occasion and bite his lip or like his lips. Sanji felt the heat rising again in his body, from both arousal and ager.

"Stop it!" Jun paid him no heed. "I said 'Stop it'! Damn it!"

"Huh? Are you talking to me?" Innocent brown eyes seemed to have just then noticed Sani's existence. For some stupid reason he could still not understand, his heart churned every single time the boy ignored him so cruelly.

"Do you see anybody else?"

"Well, no. But I wasn't doing anything… disturbing." They would play that childish game for a while, they always did. And even if he knew he would lose, Sanji would still play.

"Yes you were!"

"What? What was I doing that bothered you so, Sanji-boy?" Ah, there it was, in the tone of his velvet voice, a sliver of that wicked mind he had. Eyelashes batting in such a hypnotic way, it would bring real maidens to shame. Big round eyes demanded an answer Sanji was not yet ready to search for in the deepest corners of his soul. What was he supposed to, then, answer to his question, if he did not know the truth, nor cared for it?

"You know well enough!"

"But I really do not."

Sanji's anger was quickly replaced by something else. A heaviness on his shoulders, a weakness in his limbs. Why was Jun so cruel? Was it really something he did? Or was he just angry at the world and pinning all his wrath on him?

"Have I wronged you in a such a way? You have no better things to do than torment me?" Maybe it was just his imagination, but for a split second Jun's eyes saddened. A fraction of a moment and then it was gone. The boy still looked concerned, but there was something mischievous about it. He was planning something behind those pristine eyes. Jun got up on his feet and came close to Sanji, even after the pirate backed up a step, and then another. One hand clasped his shoulder, the other moved some of the blonde strands and rested on his forehead.

"You must have a fever, darling. Are you drinking enough water?" It took Sanji a few seconds to realize the man was so close to him, fake boobs pressing on his naked torso. He jumped and ran behind the closest tree.

"You! You are evil!"

"Oh, I have one more popsicle. We can share if you'd like~"

"Are you even listening to me? Damn cross-dresser." Sanji rested his head on the trunk of the massive tree. It was a dark shade of pink. Pink like almost every other item on that ridiculous island. He took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He had to be cursed. Jun was in front of him, sucking on that stupid popsicle. Sanji couldn't resist following his mouth. It captured the frozen sweet in a perfect O shape. Jun's eyes were on him. That was a first, he usually ignored him. With a final lick, a final image forever stuck in the pirate's head, Jun handed the popsicle to him.

"I don't want any."

"Are you sure? It's quite refreshing."

"No, thank you."

"Have you ever tried this flavor? It's strawberries and chocolate."

"No."

"It's always good to try something new." Jun's licked playfully at the melting sweet, eyes still pinned on his. Sanji was having a hard time focusing on anything but the boy's skillful tongue. All of his blood was leaving his brain and going in the lower regions of his body.

"Are we still talking about desert?"

"Why of course. What else could we be talking about?"

"Why are you doing this?" Sanji growled in annoyance.

"Trying to feed you ice cream? You look… hungry and hot." Jun closed the space between them. So close, but not really touching. He got the popsicle to Sanji's lips and tilted his head in a questioning way. Ah, such a tempting curve his neck made. The popsicle between them, Jun licked the side of the sweet that was facing him. So close those lips were. 'Pretty boy' could at any moment just throw the popsicle and defile Sanji's own mouth. Why was he thinking of such foul things? Sanji closed his eyes and willed Jun away. Maybe if he pretended he wasn't there he would go away.

Jun breathed out and cold strawberry scent hit him. He gulped again, pressing harder against the tree. It was quiet for a moment until he felt something cold on his neck. The popsicle. It trailed down along his collarbone and down on his abs at a painfully slow pace. He tried hard not to tremble but his mind, deprived of blood and water, was sending him images of Jun, cold tongue tracing the line left by the damn popsicle. And then it all stopped. Sanji heard a sigh and hoped Jun was bored and about to leave him be, before he could think of anything else to torture him with.

"You're making this too easy, Sanji-boy." His hot breath hit Sanji's lips. He must be a mere inch away. An inch away from sacrilege, from crashing his mouth to his and destroying everything Sanji was. "And also so damn hard." What was that supposed to mean?

Sanji snapped his eyes wide open, but the boy was gone. He checked the blanket and the rest of the picnic things. All gone. Another annoying thing about Jun, his Devil Fruit powers. 'Pretty boy' could teleport. Sanji was not entirely sure how that works, since he hadn't witnessed the powers, but they made him question if Jun had been actually there or his mind was playing tricks. It scared him half to death that he could be so far gone in his infatuation with beauty that he was almost willing to appreciate it even on a man. Almost.

Another couple of minutes pinned to the tree to calm the tent in his pants and he packed his training gear. Walking through the forest his mind traveled back to Jun. The boy managed to make him late again. Shaking his head, Sanji thought it was about time to think of something, a way to efficiently separate Jun's beauty from the beauty of the maidens all around the world. It was an injustice to the dames to place them in the same category as an unfortunately extremely effeminate man and it was up to the cook to make things right.

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So, the chapters will be similar to this one in length. Hope you stick around for the next one.


	3. Chapter 3

I started writing really slow for some odd reason...

Yeah... sorry for the mistakes, I'mma re-read this at some point...

Also, thanks to all of you readers out there *throws kisses* You keep me writing *throws cookies*

 **Hope you enjoy!** *creepy smiley face*

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"There I was, way off my ambitions, getting deeper in love every minute."

– F. Scott Fitzgerald

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Sitting on his bed, wide awake in the middle of the night, the Straw Hat cook would ponder on his misfortune. Emporio Ivankov was a peculiar man. He both annoyed and awed Sanji. The 'Okama King' was strong, nobody could deny that fact. But why did he have to be so weird? Of course, with the Straw Hats, the cook had seen some pretty bizarre things, but nothing compared with Kamabakka Kingdom and its monarch. Every single item on that island was like a reminder that there whole freaking place was crawling with transvestites. And what was more awful than that, men pretending to hold the pristine beauty of a dame? The ones that were not just pretending!

It was long decided that Momoiro Island was Sanji's Hell. Well, Jun was his warden. 'Pretty boy' was only concerned with making Sanji miserable. And he was doing a pretty damn good job. Sanji wished he'd be promoted in the secret hierarchy of cross-dressers and leave him alone. Though, some days he hated to admit, he looked for the boy. He kept that fact to himself, in the deepest, darkest corners of his mind. After an entire month of relentless teasing, Jun let Sanji alone. And he missed him. He was still unsure of what exactly he missed. Was it the way the sun was caught in his dark hair? Or the alluring swings of his hips? Was it the actual teasing that he craved for? Maybe he just wanted to get lost in his appearance and forget that he was stranded on an island full on men.

But, as Sanji came to realize, Jun was beautiful in more ways than just his physical aspects. People liked Jun. Everyone enjoyed his company, the cross-dressers would invite him at every party and offered to help him do various jobs. When eating lunch, the table he was at was always full, and always full of laughter. At the beginning, Sanji thought they were laughing at his expense, but he got closer to Jun's usual table and overheard some conversations. They were mostly tales of his own adventures. Random mishaps like the time he teleported face-first into a navy officer, or the time he ate some berries a strange old woman gave him and his skin was blue for an entire week.

Some days Sanji would get so caught up in Jun's stories that he forgot to eat. It was not that the boy's stories were particularly interesting or held any kind on beneficial information for him, but the way he talked. Jun was an amazing story-teller. His eyes sparkled when he rambled about things he liked, his hands would dance in the air painting the image his words presented. He could get the entire hall to listen to things as silly as tales from his childhood. Sanji's personal favorites were the poems. Not written by Jun, but the passion with which he recited some lines made time stop. He would often realize he had been holding breath as Jun's melodic voice filled the silence.

In the few days that 'Pretty boy' had been ignoring him, Sanji also noticed he was a pretty nice guy. Jun would offer his help in various tasks, would volunteer with doing the jobs no one seemed to want and generally be the best neighbor and friends someone could have. Not to mention his undying positivity and the ever-smile plastered on his face. Sanji was sure that, if the boy didn't constantly torment him and plot to get in the cook's pants, they could have been really good friends. But that was not going to happen so long he persisted with his shenanigans.

In all truth, Sanji was scared of him. He hadn't wanted to admit it, but the boy affected him in ways he never thought possible. Sanji was not gay, by no means. But him beauty-deprived soul was easily to confuse. On that forsaken pink island, Jun was like a mirage. It showed you a twisted version of something you desired, but caught in that mirage and you were as good as dead, food for the hungry vultures. That was how Sanji saw Jun, a vulture making rounds above him, waiting for the perfect moment to strike and have is ways with poor old Sanji. Unacceptable! Sacrilege!

The blonde cook rolled in his bed, dragging the covers with him. Another restless night, another day spent tired waiting to go to sleep. But once in the privacy his room had to offer, all of his fatigue would disappear. He missed his nakama. He worried about them, about Luffy in particular. Ivankov told him that his captain was in good hands, but still, the crew was worlds apart. Who knew if the others even got Luffy' message? He could ask Jun to…

No! Five second out of his mind and there he was, back again to haunt Sanji. In no possible way would he ask anything of the boy. Gods know what would he ask in return for teleporting him off the island, even if it was just to quickly check on the others. He really had to find a way to get Jun off his mind, since there was no reason him to be there in first place. He needed some air.

Sanji rolled off his bed and put his shirt back on. Stepping outside he noticed it was raining. It was nice, the hot air was being cooled down with a heavy shower. Each drop made a soft noise when it hit the canopy above his door frame. It was a calming sound, soothing him deeply. Sanji took a seat on the small stone bench, at least that was what he thought the rock construction was, and fished in his pocket for a cigar. He was running low on the nicotine supply. With the click of his lighter, he pulled in and enjoyed the feeling. One more puff and his mind panicked at the thought that he had only one more pack of cigars. Maybe two if he added all the lonely cigars scattered around his room and in his pockets. He would have to beg Ivankov for some more.

The memory of Jun offering to provide him with a steady supply of nicotine for the duration of his stay on the hellish island popped into his head. It would have been a tempting offer, if the boy hadn't mentioned he demanded a price. A price of his own choosing, from which the blonde could not retreat. That price scared Sanji, especially after Jun winked at him, the joy of the anticipated torture glimmering in his eyes. Some nights the cook had nightmares of the unspeakable things 'Pretty boy' hoped to do to him. Other nights he would wake up sweaty and wanting, the image of his flustered pretty face imprinted on the back of his mind. Why couldn't he be a woman, he already had the looks? He would see the world burning before he let Jun, the maiden, get away from him. Nevertheless, the cross-dresser was not enough.

Only when the music had stopped did Sanji realize it was there in the first place. Hidden behind the constant rainfall, the distant sounds announced him there had been another party on the island. After waking up with no memories, he decided not to join other such gatherings. They were useful in no way to his purpose to get stronger for his crew and if he was completely honest with himself, he was terrified over the things he couldn't remember. Jun had even slapped him out of nowhere, better he'd never know what happened that night.

Speaking of the devil, 'Pretty boy' appeared, surrounded by half dozen drunken cross-dressers. Of course he had been invited, Jun attended all of those crazy gatherings. They were extremely gleeful, singing and skipping as they walked to their rooms. One of them smashed an empty bottle on the pavement and howled. For someone who was trying to be a dame, that was one unladylike sound.

A the group passed him, Sanji was struck by an odd feeling of not belonging. He was an outsider on Momoiro Island no matter how he looked at it. He was alone between strangers, far, far away from his nakama. His training was slow and painful and with each passing day he felt he was losing a bit of himself.

"Why so gloomy?" Sanji didn't bother to raise his eyes. He already knew who the owner of the mellifluous voice was. Why was he depressed all of a sudden?

"I miss my crew."

"Ah, that Nami-chwan and Robin-swan again?" The boy took a seat on the bench. Sanji turned to protest but the words got stuck in his throat. Wet white shirt was pressed firmly against his skin, revealing the also white bra underneath. He briefly wondered if the panties matched, but the disturbing image of the bulge they would hide made him regret the thought.

"All my nakama, even that stupid swordsman."

"Aw, I saw his wanted poster. He's hot." Before Sanji could be outraged, the drunken cross-dresser continued. "I'd totally do him." Jun took another swing from the bottle he was carrying and offered it to the cook. "It's gin. I think." The blonde stared at the bottle. He was overwhelmed by a completely unjustified jealousy. He personally wanted nothing to do with Jun, but he was _his_ transvestite. The idea of him running away and pestering another straight guy bothered him to no end. The fact that it bothered him, bothered him also. Why was he getting so worked up anyway? It was not like Jun could just teleport to Zoro and work his vile magic on the marimo. Sanji sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"What do you want, Jun?"

"I would've said 'You', but then you said my name. I do believe this is the first time you referred to me be name. You must really be depressed."

"You want _me_? I thought you would do Zoro."

"Oh, would that bother you?" There it was, that glimmer in his doe-like eyes, that mischievous spark that fired him up. If he wasn't the target of that mischief, he'd quite enjoy the passion Jun put in his little schemes.

"I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be interested." That was true. Although Zoro didn't show the interest in women Sanji did, he did spot the swordsman check Nami's behind a couple of times. And there was that one time when his eyes were glued to Robin's generous neckline.

"But, on the off chance that he would…would it? Bother you?" Jun got closer with every word. The smell of alcohol rolled off those perfect pouty lips. The taste would surely be still tainting the soft skin.

"Of course not. What you or the shitty swordsman do in your free time does not matter to me one bit."Was that hurt in 'Pretty boy's' eyes? Surely fake. Like the rest of him. No one has such flawless skin.

"Fine." Jun got up abruptly and started walking away. He stopped as Sanji muttered another word.

"Fine." Sanji watched him with curiosity. He was just standing there in the pouring rain, head down, shouldered bent. Way to go, Sanji. You somehow managed upset him even more. God knows what plan he'll put in action against you now. Fantastic!

"You know what your problem is, Sanji?"

"Enlighten me, please." The words escaped his mouth before his brain actually processed them. He was going to regret this. Jun turned to face him, a playful smile on his face. Mood swings, much?

"You're taking everything too serious? Enjoy what life gives you. Dance in the rain for once." Without a warning, Jun yanked him off the stone bench and pulled him in the rain.

"What the- Hey, let go!"

"Wooohooo. Not a chance, Sanji-boy!" In a matter of seconds he was spinning, or rather being span around by the world most convincing cross-dresser. He protested a little more, but after a while, wet t the bone, the cool air running through his damp hair and the dizziness got to him. There was a short moment when he felt truly free. No training to complete, no masters to defeat, no crazy crew to worry about.

With all the spinning, one of them tripped. They stumbled onto one another and fell in a small puddle, Jun on top of him. His black hair surrounded their faces like a dark curtain. He saw the surprised expression on the boy's face and couldn't stop his hand from cupping his cheek. The action only made Jun more dumbstruck. But 'Pretty boy' recovered quickly. Sanji's hands were pinned above his head in the blink on an eye.

"You shouldn't play with me, Sanji-boy"

"Oh, but you play with me all the time." Wrong choice of words, he realized too late. A giant grin formed on his lip. He reached is ear and whispered, the contrast of his hot breath on his cold skin making him shiver.

"You haven't experienced half of what I'll do to you." The boy's knee traveled dangerously close between his legs. Why was this turning him on? It should disgust the hell out of him. The fact that he was secretly enjoying it made him sick, but the fact remained: he liked the constant harassment of his transvestite.

Sanji clenched his teeth to the point where it became painful. Such foul thoughts were unacceptable to a gentleman like himself. Jun giggled at his action in a girly manner, releasing his hands to cover his mouth. He got up and went to recover the forgotten bottle on the bench.

"You're cute." He made a few steps in the direction of his room, then turned to look at Sanji over his shoulder. "But I'd still do the swordsman." The cook got up slowly and watched the brunette walk away, hips swaying seductively through the rain. He felt like punching himself. Hard! What was wrong with him lately? _His_ cross-dresser? He wanted Jun out of his life as quickly as possible. Still, there he was, craving to kiss the man. The pink island was getting to him. Had the candies drugged him? Was it all Ivankov's plan?

As he entered his room, one thing was clear to Sanji: Jun was going to be the death of him.

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Bam! Another chapter.

'Till next time *wink*


	4. Chapter 4

So, I'm alive.

Yeah... I have like no excuse for taking so long to post this chapter. I had like 70% of it already written. But I started reading a book and then the second one and TV series and life... and the fact that I procrastinate a lot... I am ashamed and sorry.

Also, it's like 3:30 a.m. right now... I'm too tired to spell check [ I'll get back to that some day... ]

 _Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

"There is a madness in loving you,

a lack of reason that makes it feel so flawless."

\- Leo Christopher

* * *

It was not enough that he had succumbed to such perversities, allowing his body to react to the tricks and misleading of the 'Pretty boy'. Oh, no! Even his mind was betraying him. Night after night he would be plagued by the same nightmares. He laid there on his bed, eyes open starring at the ceiling through the darkness, the perfectly round moon being the only source of light. It was the fifth night in a row when he'd woken up feeling sick and violated, the fifth time he would dream of Jun all sweating and mewling. And the worst part was that it was not even him who made the boy shiver in pure bliss. It would have been better is it was him. Instead, again and again he would see the shitty swordsman defiling Jun.

Sanji sighed and placed his right hand over his eyes. But filthy image just flooded his mind. He tried playing the dream again, from the beginning to the end, in hopes he could finally fall asleep after. The nightmare was always the same: Zoro would catch Jun's eye and the boy would start playing with him, much like he did to Sanji. But unlike the blonde, the marimo would eventually pin Jun against a wall and kiss him. Sanji resisted opening his eyes, ignoring the nausea he felt. He watched, like an insignificant fly on the wall, the pair's lust filled eyes, the exploring hands that kept uncovering more and more skin, their bodies pressing harder against one another.

When the shitty swordsman roughly turned Jun around and pressed his dick against the brunette's ass Sanji was sure he was going to barf and die asphyxiated. But he survived, eyes shut tightly. As Zoro started pounding into 'Pretty boy', the marimo became blurry, out of focus. Instead, Sanji could see Jun perfectly: hands positioned on either side of his head, his damp black curtain of hair, plump lips parted, heavily breathing in and out, fake but perfectly shaped boobs bouncing, a pair of hands holding his waist and guiding his body. Those could be his hands.

No! No! No!

Sanji jumped out of bed, the sudden movement and his lack of sleep making him dizzy and weak. He grabbed the wall for support and went to the small bathroom. His reflection in the mirror looked exactly as he felt, deplorable. Bloodshot eyes, dark circles, unkept beard. He splashed some cold water on his face and debated if he should also take a shower. The throbbing in his pants told him he should. Robe pooling at his feet he stepped into the shower and turned the water ice-cold. It was a horrible idea, he could get sick. Jun was already ill after that night he spent in the rain.

Jun again! He pressed his head against the tiles. The simple passing of "Pretty _boy'_ through his head and his manhood was already up and ready. Stupid cross-dresser and his feminine appearance. The cook tried to imagine the boy's dick. That would surely turn him off. But no matter how hard he focused, there was nothing. He tried with Zoro and a big staff surrounded by green curly hair popped up. Sanji shivered and took his tongue out in disgust. He proceeded with the other transvestites and various dicks of all shapes invaded his brain. When he felt he couldn't take it no more, he opened his eyes and saw his own dick, lifeless. Good! There was still some sense into it.

He toweled down and wrapped the robe around himself for warmth. He climbed back in bed and finally felt like sleep was going to take him away. And it did. He was awakened by the bright sun on his face. Already day? He wanted to sleep some more, but his stomach kept growling so he changed his clothes and left for the kitchen.

He distracted himself with the preparation of some food, leaving some for the others, then went to eat outside. It was a finally warm, no more rain and wind. He sat at a lonely table on the patio, greeting the other cross-dressers that were eating there as well. He took a few bites, looking around, mre out of boredom than anything else, and then he spotted him. Apparently Jun was still pretty sick.

"Tch, tch, tch. Sanji, dear, you do know there is a word for what yo are going through, right?" It was Caroline, Ivanko's substitute when he is gone. Was it that obvious that the boy was affecting him in ways he could not understand?

"Hm, what word is that?"

"Kalopsia."

"Ah, the delusion of things being more beautiful than they truly are?"

"Indeed." The redhead sat himself besides Sanji and threw dirty glances towards poor Jun. The brunette kept coughing and covering his mouth with a white handkerchief. Such a lady-like gestures.

"Why do you say that, Carol-sama? I though all of you agreed Jun was at least pretty when you guys made his nickname stick."

"Pretty he is. Damn, beautiful even if you'd like and if he is your type. But perfect he is not."

"I never said he was!"

"Please, Sanji, you may fool some, but an old candy like myself? Never! Jun has you wrapped tightly around his little finger." The blonde opened his mouth to defend himself but snapped it shut instead. How could he deny the accusation? It was true. The only flaw Sanji 'saw' was the boy's dick. Other than that, sheer perfection. If you were looking at Jun as a woman that is. As a man, 'Pretty boy' was just that: pretty, not an adjective a true man would consider a compliment. "It's unfair, really. He keeps you all for himself. Got you so smitten you won't even look our way." The cross-dresser was speaking as if Sanji would ever consider… with a man? Who was the redhead taking him for? Jun was an oddity, a paradox.

"Why do you think he's not perfect?" Carol raised an eyebrow at the pirate's sudden question and watched him curiously as he took another bite.

"You see no flaws in him? Even now?" The transvestite was probably referring to Jun's miserable state. His eyes were puffy, his nose was red, ebony hair tangled in a messy bun. His clothes were no better. He looked as if he picked the baggiest items in his closet. But all of those were… temporal. Jun was not going to be sick forever. If anything, his weak figure awaked in Sanji a need to protect the young man. Ever the white knight in shining armor, ready to assist a damsel in distress. Only the was no damsel in the equation, only another dude.

"No, not really. Except the obvious: he's a man." A wicked grin spread across Carol's face. It made the cook extremely uneasy. He felt like he said something wrong or something that he was surely going to regret later on.

"What gives him away?"

"What?"

"What makes you so sure that Jun is a man? What gives away his… secret?" Carol's eyes were fixed on the brunette a few tables away. He was apparently giving the boy a full inspection from afar, searching for some flaw that attested he was indeed a man.

"Well, I already know he is. I can not un-know it."

"But how exactly do you know, Sanji?"

"We're on an island full of men. Granted, men that dress like women. But still an island filled only with men." Where was the transvestite going with this conversation? Sanji was starting to get annoyed by the endless questions about Jun.

"And that automatically makes Jun a man too?"

"Not by itself, no. But then there is Jun's… manhood."

"You've seen it?" The redhead snapped his head towards him, eyes wide and eyebrows high. What kind of a question was that?

"Heavens, no! Why would I do such a thing?" For some stupid reason Sanji was not feeling were well. His heart was pounding and he felt hot. Carol was seriously getting on his every nerve. "I mean I did see the bulge once when he was wearing pants…"

The cross-dresser looked at him blankly for a few seconds. Then, out of the blue, he started laughing hysterically, leaving the pirate dumbstruck. Carol was making such a ruckus heads started to turn their way. Sanji just wanted to hide. He stared intently at a small spot on the table. What was it? A coffee stain? As the man besides him started to calm down, he lifted his head and was met with the ever so curious gaze of Jun.

Sound fades for a moment. Maybe Carol finally calmed down and the others made quiet. Maybe he was going deaf. Or maybe he was captured in those eyes, so deep that oceans would be jealous of. Maybe, just maybe, he was being drawn towards that incredibly beautiful creature that was Jun, caught in the spell the boy had put over him.

And of course I was not meant to last. 'Pretty boy' looked away and started coughing in his handkerchief. For a moment there Sanji wanted to go over to him and see if there was anything he could do to make the beautiful transvestite feel better. But Jun told the cross-dressers at his table something and left in a hurry. Sanji's eyes followed his retreating figure.

"You planning to go after him?"

"What?" He turned his head only to see Carol's smug grin. The man was pissing him off big time. Why didn't he mind his own business? "Why would I go after him?"

"How would I know? You're the one that was looking like an abandoned puppy after his owner. You tell me."

"I don't belong to anybody. My only duty is to my captain and crew."

"What about your desires, Sanji? What do _you_ want?"

"How did you even get to that? But fine. If you really want to know all I want is to get over with this training as soon as possible and leave this forsaken island to find my nakama. That is all I dream about."

"Whatever lets you sleep."

"Wha-? What is that supposed to mean?" He was outraged. How dare the redhead imply his words were not true. As is his main purpose on there was not to become stronger and rejoin the crew.

"All I meant was that you're not being true to yourself. You should try it. It may save you a lot of pain." Sanji had no more time to reply. By the time his brain processed the transvestite's words, he was already at another table talking with the others. The pirate got up himself and strolled around aimlessly.

Be true to himself. How was he supposed to do that? Wasn't he already? He admitted to himself that he found Jun attractive. There was no denying that anymore. He could also say that if Jun were a woman he'd do anything humanly possible to make her his. A real woman, not some weird 'thing' created with Ivankov's devil fruit powers. He shivered at the idea of finally getting a woman all for himself and have her one day transform into a man. He stopped and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He was pretty sure he was going to question this for the rest of his life. Were woman really women or some modified enigmas that had the misfortune of meeting the drag queen Ivankov?

In his wandering around the island he found himself in the forest at the edge of a lake. Damn, even the water was pink here. With a sigh, the blonde cook sat on an old fallen tree trunk. His head fell down and the black shine of is shoes soothed him. Like a warm wave of something familiar, something he was comfortable with. His mind darted to the experience of fighting in a dress that the transvestites were forcing him to wear. Every fight and all the training sessions with them only happened after he was dressed up. And oh, how he hated the make up. It got into his eyes when he was sweating and I took him forever to get it off. It was truly a nightmare.

Sanji pursed his lips and checked his pockets for a cigar. He had none. He had run out a couple of days before, but he kept searching every nook and cranny for more. Cursing under his breath, his elbows rested n his knees as his head feel in his hands. Trembling fingers passed through his blonde strands in a sad attempt to relax himself. He desperately needed tobacco. And a woman. He was pretty sure that, if a woman suddenly appeared on the island, he'd end up begging her to just let him look at her every waking hour. That, if he wouldn't die of blood loss the second his eyes fall upon an actual female.

Rustling behind him made him turn around and notice some joyful squires running up and down the trees, chasing one after another. He wished he could be that carefree, even if just for a day. If he was being true t himself, he'd shout out loud that he was utterly depressed. He was tired despite resting enough, lonely though there was usually someone around him, sad even though he smiled every day. He had no idea what were his nakama up to. He was mostly sure they were doing alright. Where his crew lacked in strength they made up in stubbornness. But they had never been apart for so long. And Luffy was going through a lot, Sanji hoped the captain was in good hands.

Lastly, and most importantly, he had run out of cigars. What was he going to do? He could already feel the effects of withdrawal. He didn't know what to do with his hands, he was jumpy and easily aggravated by the smallest things. Early in the morning he shouted to the faucet of the sink because the water was not hot enough. As if it was the faucet's fault, a conspiracy led by the faucets all around the world.

He was losing his mind, his mind rambling. Or maybe he was already insane. How could he tell? Mad people think they are normal and the rest of the world is wrong. But whether he had a loose screw or not, he had to focus. Takes things slow and one at a time. He had one year and a half left to master the transvestites fighting style and learn the recipes.

First things first: get some cigars.

* * *

I can't believe this is only the 4th chapter I posted. I have tons of ideas in my head, but actually putting them in words takes me a lot longer than I expected. Anyways, just so you know I plan on finishing this story even if it takes me a while to do so.

Hope you'll have patience and keep reading this *puppy eyes* I will try and post more often.


	5. Chapter 5

Before you start reading this chapter... Have you read the manga? OMG I'm so curious I could die right here on my bed :(((

Also, warm hugs to all of you that read this story and leave reviews *HUGS* You guys are awesome :3

Ok, you can proceed :D

 _Hope you enjoy!_

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"She turned my madness into music,

and her love became my favorite song."

-Jonny Ox

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Morning found Sanji wide awake. He spent all night tossing and turning and when he had finally settled in the perfect position, the worst headache hit him without mercy. He could feel the pounding of his veins against the skin. He had tried moving his head, setting it in various ways, arranged the pillow differently, but nothing worked. It was the forth night in a row he was not sleeping. He remembered when Nami had insomnia once. It was one of the worst weeks the Straw Hats endured; all the screaming and the punching and the hitting made all of them grumpy. He wondered if he'd become like that, since he definitely wanted to scream at someone, anyone, on the off chance that it would help him fall asleep.

He was so tired he wanted to cry. His muscles hurt from all the "Bride Training". As he advanced through the ranks of Ivankov's Newkama Kenpo masters, they become tougher and tougher. He expected as much. What he did not expect was the trouble he was having with the recipes. The previous day when Adaline-sama, the 27th master he had defeated, was showing him how to prepare the Hormone Chicken Stew, he kept making stupid mistakes. His attention spawn was limited to a few minutes and that only if he tried really hard to focus. He added sugar instead of salt, he dropped the entire bag of pepper in the mix, he set the temperature too high and he even dropped a few bowls breaking them. What was wrong with him? He was supposed to be at least a decent cook in his worst days. Looking at his performance, an outsider would think he had never stepped in a kitchen in his entire life.

He truly wanted to learn the Attack Cuisine so he could aid his nakama with his passion - cooking. That was never going to happen if he kept spacing out and ruining the dishes. Also, if his insomnia persisted, Sanji was pretty sure he was not going to defeat another master. He could barely lift his limbs, there was no way he could throw a kick and actually do some damage.

He finally gathered the strength to lift himself off the bed. Sitting on the edge he saw his room was in the same miserable condition: his gentleman clothes as well as two ridiculous dresses he had fought in were piled together in a corner, a variety of empty bottles that once held either water, cognac or whisky were plastered all over the room and lastly, plates and trays of food that he brought back because he was still hungry after dinner laid around on the carpet. He had to clean up. The mess didn't represent him; he was tidy. He was not a neat freak, but his room and kitchen back on Sunny were sparkly clean. Had he finally gone mad? Had the stupid pink island changed him so bad already? It couldn't all be because he hadn't smoked a cigar in a week, could it?

Sanji ruffled his hair and went through his morning routines in a daze. He attempted to clean the room, but all he did was place the clothes in the washing basket. He would take it to the laundry room some other time. Before leaving his room he decided he should at least open the windows. Fresh air might help him fall asleep later.

The blonde cook went straight to the kitchen, nodding shortly at the gleeful cross-dressers and opened the fridge. He closed it and went through the cabinets, opening and closing the doors one after another, not finding anything he'd like to eat and sometimes actually forgetting what he was looking for. He stared at the row of cabinets and let out a frustrated cry when he could only remember what was in half of them. He _was_ losing it! He poured himself a giant cup of coffee and went for a walk.

He strolled aimlessly, occasionally sipping from the mug. The coffee was horrible, the person who made it had no taste buds. But he kept drinking. The more he walked, the more he was falling into some kind of depression. He felt the sadness creeping up like a chillness in his bones. He stared at the empty mug and after a couple of seconds he slammed it to the grounds. Mocking him, the mug laid unscratched in the soft grass. A vein popped on his temple. The pirate picked up the object and smashed it against a tree. It shattered to multicolored pieces. It made him feel even worse; whoever said destroying things was therapeutic was an idiot. Or just liked breaking stuff. Or perhaps _he_ wasn't even able to properly wreck things anymore.

Putting as much distance between him and the shameful spot where he had murdered an innocent cup, Sanji headed towards the beach. With his shoes in his left hand and his jacket over his right shoulder, he walked on the warm sand. He was away from the water but he could hear the waves. It was peaceful, but none of it mattered to the blonde. His mind was only thinking about how perfect a cigar would look in his hand, how the scenery would be truly magnificent seen through the smoke he would exhale if he had one little cigar.

A soft sound brought him out of his despair. He looked around until he spotted a familiar parasol. Jun was close to the water, sitting on his little blanket, playing with something that, from the distance, resembled a guitar. Sanji missed Brook, he missed his cheerful songs and his jokes about being a skeleton. He missed all of his nakama. And my god, how he missed tobacco! How would Franky react if he ran out of Cola? Was there any Cola wherever he was? For the sake of his friend, he hoped there was. No one should have to go through the kind of pain he was feeling.

The pirate didn't think he could survive an encounter with 'Pretty boy', so he decided to walk around and ignore him. The brunette had his back towards Sanji and was apparently concentrated on changing the strings to what was indeed a guitar. But the cook was so tired his feet could barely push through the sand. He spotted a fallen log directly behind the boy. It kind of looked like an ugly pillow. He sat down and rolled his jacket placing it between his head and the log.

The beach was soothing, the sun warming the icy feeling he had beneath his skin, waves rolling on the shore. And then there was Jun, beautiful as ever, even from behind. He was sitting crossed legged, guitar on his lap, his long ebony hair gathered in a high pony tail. He had some kind of pastel-colored shawl draped over his shoulders. If Sanji hadn't known he was a man he could have bet on is very soul that Jun was the fairest maiden his eyes had ever laid upon.

After is conversation with Carol-Sama some days ago, the cook reexamined his appreciation of the boy. Why was he so flawless in his eyes? He could think of women that would be considered by others far more beautiful. Vivi for example was, by the standards of most men, the epitome of beauty. She was the perfect mixture of stunning and cute, she was funny and carefree and had lovely hair and skin as soft as silk. Not to mention she was a real princess. And a real woman. Why then could Sanji only picture Jun in his mind when the words 'damsel' or 'alluring' or 'gorgeous' came in his mind? Why so infatuated?

He gulped hard when 'Pretty boy' stretched his lean arms and rubbed his neck with delicate fingers. The brunette wasn't even trying to annoy him and still managed to get a reaction out of the cook. He banged his head hard against the log and stared at the blue sky above. Why was he sitting here, tired and depressed, a few paces away from the person he mostly tried to avoid? In all fairness, since he got sick, Sanji hadn't seen much of the brunette. He looked like he was better now, as there was no coughing or blowing of his nose. Then why hadn't he bothered the cook? Had he gotten bored of him?

He chucked, managing to be as silent as possible. He couldn't blame Jun for getting bored of him. He was no fun at all the last couple of days: he snapped at people, he had mood swings and little anxiety attacks. Hell, Sanji was bored with himself. How could the boy want to hang around him in this state?

The first notes that came from the guitar were so out of tune they made Sanji grimace. The last thing he needed were those awful screeches piercing his ears, as if his head didn't already weight a ton. But after a short while, as Jun kept adjusting the strings, the soft sounds became pleasant. Random notes turned into a catchy tune. He closed his eyes and just sat there listening. He felt somewhat lighter as a breeze cooled him, taking away with it a bit of his headache.

Sanji opened his eyes after a while to look at the brunette, somewhat weary of him still. Oblivious to his presence, the boy kept striking the cords creating calming music. The cook yearned to hear his voice. He shook his head at his ridiculous desire. But the longer he watched him, the more he wished he was there under same umbrella. He could rest his head against the boy's leg and watched his hands as they moved. He would be able to see his face; was his eyebrows furrowed in concentration or did he wear a careless smile?

When had he succumbed so far? He was way too tired to fight against his own thoughts. There was no need to exhaust himself further by denying what was plain to see, even if it also burned a hole in his pride. When had Sanji - the ladies' man, became Sanji - the obsessed-with-a-transvestite guy. One ravishing, head-turning, sweet, gentle transvestite. There were mermaids who couldn't hold a candle to Jun.

As he was remembering the adventures of his crew with Kokoro, the alcoholic mermaid, and Chimney, her granddaughter, the brunette started humming along with his guitar. It wasn't actual singing and Sanji could barely hear it, but it sounded like the enchanting call of a siren. He found himself once again wishing he could be next to him, wondering how would the boy's fingers feel as they passed though his hair, caressing his scalp. Would it take away his worries and pain? He'll probably never know since he'd die before he'd ask Jun to caress him or let him rest his head in his lap.

The blonde cook let out a long breath and closed his eyes. He listened to the music mixed with the low humming and the sound of waves. The sand was burning beneath him, but he didn't mind. Occasional breezes helped his hot skin. As he was being lulled to sleep, he pictured himself on the blanket, next to Jun, his forehead pressed to his thigh so he wouldn't bother the movement of his hands on the guitar.

* * *

I always feel like I had something more to say...

Eh well...

I'm thinking next chapter will be more from Jun's head, since Sanji will still be depresses & stuff. Would you guys like some insight into the woman that is Jun?


	6. Chapter 6

So I wrote this... and wanted to wait a little longer before posting it... but nah... here it is :))

Rakuen91, I like you *blush*

 _Hope you enjoy!_

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"She sprouted love like flowers,

Grew a garden in her mind,

And even in the darkest days,

From her smile the sun still shined."

-Erin Hanson

* * *

After a week of feeling dizzy and having to blow her nose every five minutes, Jun finally felt better. As morning caught her in a good mood she decided she could use some sun. Being cooped up in her room, draped like a burrito in her blanket made her yearn to feel the hot rays on her skin. She grabbed her picnic supplies and headed toward the kitchen to make some snacks and something to drink. Lemonade maybe? It was fast to make and she wanted to spend as little time indoors today as she could. On her way out she strapped the old guitar she had found. Some strings were missing and she had been meaning to replace them since before she got ill. Better late than never, right? One of her favorite sayings.

Being as lovely as they always were, the candies greeted her, stating how relieved or happy they were to see her in good health. Eleanor-chan joked that if she had to hear her caught one more time she would have left the island until Jun got better. The brunette felt a little embarrassed, but she knew it was not the cross-dresser's intention to make her feel so.

She entered the kitchen and quickly packed some sandwiches. With swift movements she washed some lemons and two oranges, chopped them in half and drained them of their delicious juice. As she was pouring the mix into the big thermos, Sanji walked in and headed straight to the fridge. She trailed him with her eyes, her hands adding ice to her beverage and finally closing the cap. The blonde cook looked… like he was some poor homeless soul. His hair was messy. It had gotten longer since she had first seen him months ago. The ends of his golden mane curled in a funny way, as if he had used the curler all wrong. If he didn't shave soon, the stubble would turn into a full beard. Jun didn't particularly like beards. Some stubble and maybe, just maybe a goatee, were hot, manly. Unkept beard - not so much.

She continued to watch the man as he frantically searched through the cabinets. What was up with him? He let out a low frustrated growl, poured himself some coffee and, without noticing the silent-as-a-mouse Jun, he stormed out. But not before she caught a glimpse of his eyes. It was clear that he hadn't been sleeping well. Worry steeped into her, an instinctual desire to help making her brain put together a list of things she could do to make things better.

No, no, no! It was her day to just relax and enjoy the weather. Placing the thermos in the picnic basket, she teleported on the beach, leaving all thoughts of Sanji in the kitchen. Well, at least for a short while. The brunette walked along the shore in search of the perfect spot. She saw a fallen tree and pondered if she should sit on the log, but finally decided she wanted to be closer to the water. After Jun installed the parasol, its pole deep in the sand, she placed the blanket down an turned towards the sea. It was beautiful and frightening in the same time. She missed swimming so much. She was not a remarkably good swimmer, the muscles of her arms needing more practice, but she loved the feeling of floating and diving deep in the blue unknown. She took a step closer and waited for the wave to reach her feet. When it did, nausea hit her almost instantly. It was not unbearable. But if she took a few more steps she was probably going to collapse and drown in water that didn't pass her knees. It was truly unfair, all that power one gained from eating a Devil Fruit, just to be rendered invalid if you fell in the sea.

Jun sighed and sat down on her blanket. She smiled as she got the guitar out of its case. If was an old little thing, with lots of scribbling on it and only 2 cords left. From what she had gathered, the instrument had no owner; it was passed from candy to candy and ended up eventually abandoned in a storage room. Jun was glad she had found it, even if she did not get the actual thing she was looking for – the device that hopefully would torture the cook a little more. Before she had gotten the flu, she was planning on upping her game, wanting to see how much longer was the blonde going to resist. The upcoming party provided her with the perfect idea. Perfect only if she managed to get over the embarrassment of wearing the outfit Simonne-chan made for her. But that was for another day.

As she was strapping on the spare strings, her thoughts revolved around him. Sanji looked really bad. She couldn't help but make theories in her head about the reason behind his degrading state. Was it the training? It was true the transvestites were working him hard and the outfits he had to wear looked ridiculous on the man, but surely he was not that week as to break down because he had to wear a dress. The high heels though, she could totally understand if he was losing sleep because of the torture devices that were stilettos.

But it was probably not that. Maybe he missed his crew. Jun pouted in a childish manner as a combination of sadness and anger filled her when she remembered the countless times her crush cried out for Robin and Nami. She was not jealous, no! It was just unfair that he didn't see her, if not beautiful, at least pretty. Even cute worked for her? She would take 'Ugly woman' over 'Pretty boy' any day.

Wanting to get her mind off the infuriating but drop-dead-gorgeous cook, Jun began adjusting the guitar and trying to remember the first song that came to mind. Music had been her father's passion and while she did not share such an intense feeling as he had, she did love to play. It reminded her of the times she was young, her loving parent laughing as she banged on the strings trying to mimic him or the happy times when he made the music and her mother danced, Jun giggling in her arms. It felt like aeons ago. She should visit the old house and their graves some time soon.

She stretched her arms after a while, stiff from staying in the same position. After taking a swing from the cool lemonade, she tried another song, her fingers falling into a familiar pattern. A low hum emerged from her throat as she remembered the tune better. She wished she had inherited her father's ability to sing. But she hadn't. After countless attempts, Jun had long ago gotten over the fact that she sounded like a strangled stray cat. She could hear the sounds coming out all wrong, she knew how they were supposed to be, but her voice just didn't cooperate. Humming had to suffice, though even that sounded off if she was louder.

She played for a while, feeling contempt as the sun rose higher above her head and finally being blocked by her parasol, signaling it was noon. Jun placed the guitar down and rubbed her sore fingertips. She picked up a sandwich from the basket and ate in silence while watching the waves roll. If anyone asked her what was her favorite place to relax she would answer 'the beach' without a second thought. Another two sandwiches later she downed the lemonade, taking the remains of an ice cube in her mouth. Laying on her back and spreading her arms on the blanket she closed her eyes. She cursed herself internally as a certain blonde appeared on the back of her eyelids. Why did she have such bad luck in love? Her last boyfriend betrayed her crew and damned them all to a slow but certain death in Impel Down. The one before had been a cheating bastard and her first love turned out to be a fully fledged psychopath, lying and manipulating with every word that left his mouth. And now she was smitten with a womanizer who thought she was a cross-dressing man. Oh, joy!

Maybe the problem was with her and not the men. Or maybe just all men were like that. Who knew? She was not going to mope; she was going to have fun with whatever life threw her way instead. Sanji was the current object of her unrequited affection… slash borderline obsession.

The man was intoxicating. Since that fateful night when he had kissed her, he was constantly on her mind. She would spend hours watching him with love struck eyes as he lifted weights or cooked. And gods, he was a damn good cook! Her taste buds had orgasms whenever she ate some of his dishes.

 _"The things I'd do to you if you were a woman…"_

Jun felt her cheeks heat up and covered her face with her palms. Damn! He could undress her with his words only, but he decided to be a stubborn ass and pretend she was a transvestite. Sometimes she thought he was playing with her as she fooled around with him. How would have things progressed between them if he had acknowledged her as the woman she was? Would they have gotten along instantly? Could they have been, in that moment, there on the beach, entangled in one another's arms? What would he do tomorrow if he finally realized what she was? Be ashamed of his ridiculous mistake or ask her for a second chance at getting to know each other? If Sanji ever came to his senses she would like a second go, since the 'Pretty boy' she usually portrayed around him was not entirely herself. It was a role, born from the anger and annoyance the man sparked in her, as well as from the challenge he provoked when he whispered those sinful words into her ear. Little devil he was, that Sanji-boy.

With her mind still plagued by the Straw Hat cook, Jun thought it was about time she got back to civilization. A few drinks and laughs with Iva and the candies would distract her from the blond for a short while. Picnic supply gathered, she was about to zap back in her rook and take a shower since there was sand in her hair and on her legs when she noticed the figure lying on the sand. She approached lazily, her eyebrow rising as she realized who exactly it was. Of course she had to stumble upon him after she spent hours daydreaming about him.

Jun crouched besides him and took hold of the arm plastered over his eyes. When he didn't move she wanted to poke him but stopped. He just looked so tired. His expression was calm and his breathing even, but the dark circles were still visible below his closed eyes. Her hand moved on its own accord to caress his cheek, removing the sand from his handsome face. Jun gulped and gently passed her fingers through his hair. She wanted to kiss him so badly! She craved his skin against hers, her name rolling off his tongue between breaths. Her head inched closer, casting a shadow on his jaw. What would happen if he opened his eyes now and see 'Pretty boy' ogling over him? She pulled back frustrated, not sure if she should kiss him so he could despair later or ignore him because he was such a stubborn blind idiot.

"Oi, Sanji, wake up!" Well, he surely didn't deserve to sleep. She stabbed his side with her index finger when he didn't move a muscle. "Yo, Sanji-boy, Come on! You should get to your bed." She picked up his hand again, lifted it in the air and let go. It fell like a rook back on the sand.

Panic set in, her eyes wide and her brows furrowed. What was wrong with him? Jun called out his name a few more times, shaking him in the process, but to no avail. It was as if he was in a coma. What could she do? There was no way she could carry him all the way to his room, so the only possibility was to teleport with him there. But she didn't like zapping with other people. It took a tool on her, rendering her muscles almost useless for a couple of minutes. It became painful only if she repeated the action with others shortly after.

She looked around one last time, hoping to see someone on the beach that could carry the cook. The two of them were the only souls there though. She shook her head and bent down to place his arm around her neck. With one hand holding her things, guitar strapped on her back and Sanji's heavy body kept up with her other hand, Jun closed her eyes and focused on the man's room. She had seen the inside of it through the opened door once, so she knew exactly where she needed to get. Moments later they appeared at the foot of his king size bed. She quickly dropped her stuff, using the little strength she had in both arms to place him gracefully oh the silky sheets. A groan escaped her when the guitar's headstock hit her. Rubbing the back of her head she let herself fall slowly besides the bed to rest.

"Holly crap!" His room was a mess. She knew men were animals, but she always imagined the blonde kept his room as clean and organized as he did with his kitchen. Empty bottles and fifthly plates were scattered all around the equally dirty carpet. A laundry basket was spilling out clothes in the middle of the room. It was really not what she expected. No wonder he was all depressed and jumpy, who could sleep in such a hogsty?

Jun waited a few more minutes until she felt her limbs again. Letting out a long breath she picked up the basket and in a matter of two seconds she transported it to the laundry room and came back, almost as if she had never left. If was easy with inanimate objects. She gathered the bottles and the plates and zapped them in the kitchen, sending a mental apology to whoever had the misfortune of being on cleaning duty that night. She would have done it herself, but she was neither the damn cook's mother nor his servant. It was degrading enough that she was cleaning his room after the way he treated her.

Angry at him as she was, she still couldn't get rid of the concern she felt for his well-being. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she watched Sanji. He was dead to the world. She could probably have her ways with him and he'd sleep the entire time. Who slept like that? It wasn't normal. Jun herself was quite a heavy sleeper, being able to sleep in weird places with loud noises, but she'd wake up instantly if someone attempted to lift her body of throw her on a mattress.

The back of her palm rested on his forehead. He didn't have a fever. That was good but it didn't tell her anything about his state. She brushed his hair out of his face. She couldn't stay mad at him for long, especially when he looked so vulnerable. Her fingers traced his swirling eyebrow, slithered down his cheek, slid from his jaw to his chin, smoothly brushing the stubble. When her thumb passed over his lips he let out a soft gasp. Jun shivered, fearing she would crumble to pieces. He was so adorable. Her finger caressed the base of his lower lip as she kept repeating in her head that she should not kiss him. But what if it was like that fairytale her mother read her once, where the Sleeping Beauty was awakened with a kiss? His life depended on her lips immorally pressed to his.

"You're driving me insane, Sanji-boy." It took all her will power to detach herself from his bed. She placed the blanker over his body and closed the windows before turning to leave. As she reached for the doorknob, she felt something squishing under her sandal. Lifting her foot she saw an empty pack of cigars. Picking the object up, her eyes darted from it to Sanji and back. She had noticed the cook was a heavy smoker and she knew tobacco withdrawal could give all sorts of negative effects: headaches, anxiety, insomnia, diarrhea… But could they actually get so bad as to put him in a coma-like sleep?

Jun left his room in a hurry. She needed to cool down and think. But the more she stared at the empty pack in her hand, the wickeder her thoughts got.

She could make him beg! She could hold a cigar between two fingers and make him kneel at her feet, at her mercy! Plead and say he'd do anything for another drag. She bit her lower lip and shook her head. She was a tease, but she was not evil. Taking another look at the brand of Sanji's smokes, she thought it would be nice of her to get him some. Maybe she'll even convince him to give her one little kiss as payment.

* * *

So yeah...

Until next time *Hugs & Kisses*


	7. Chapter 7

I had things to say... but it got late and now I'm just sleepy.

 _Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

"It seems to me, that love could be labeled poison and we'd drink it anyways."

-Atticus

* * *

He was doomed. He knew that from the moment he realized he was already in a pink-laced hell, but, as he took another drag, nicotine filling once again his blood, a new feeling engulfed him. Sanji closed his eyes enjoying the smell of tobacco. He could see his end clearly, his ultimate downfall.

When he woke up just minutes before, he felt good- the effect of a good night's sleep after days of insomnia. The magic only started when he found a sole cigar on his nightstand, a little red bow tight loosely around it. He lit it without a second's thought and as the object of his addiction was reaching its end, Sanji foresaw his own ruin. After all, all magic comes with a price. The miraculous appearance of his salvation - the burning cigar between his fingers - was an innocent gesture at first glance. A gift. But with one came the promise of more, an endless supply maybe of his favorite brand of cigars.

The cook guessed the one calling the shots was no other than 'Pretty boy'. He was on the beach, the place where his memories stopped. And was the only one able to acquire goods from across the sea so fast was Jun. He was also the one who most likely dragged him to his room. A cold shiver ran down his spine at the thought of what perversities were done to his unconscious body. It scared him to no end and still left a fuzzy feeling in his stomach. He was probably just hungry.

He went through his routines, noticing some of the mess in his room was gone. His once dirty clothes were clean and nicely folded in his dresser. _He_ went through his dresser? He thought of checking if any of his underwear were missing, but decided he really rather not know. But the thought made him recall some funny incidents involving Brook and some panties. In about thirty minutes he was fresh and standing outside his room.

What were his options? On one hand he could act uninterested in 'Pretty boy's' unspoken offer. But that would only lead to more humiliation later on. Sanji shook his head and started looking for the pervy bastard. He was already craving another cigar. On the other hand he could beg and hope the brunette would go easy on him. But Sanji had a good idea of how Jun's mind worked, so he knew he would not miss this opportunity to torture him.

He was growing more anxious by the minute. What would be asked of him in return for _his_ tobacco? What would he be willing to give up to Jun? The cross-dressers were already humiliating him by making him dress as one of them, so what could Jun do worse than that?

"Hey there, Sanji-boy!" He snapped his head around but saw no one. When he heard him chuckle he looked up. And there he was, with that intoxicating smile, sitting on the lowest branch of a tree, his back leaning against the trunk, a book placed delicately in his lap. And why in the name of all the Sea Gods did he have to wear a sun dress? Silky and flowing down his feminine figure, it almost made the blood rush to his head and out his nose. Almost.

"Good day to you, Jun." Sanji cleared his throat, feeling uncomfortable under the boy's amused stare.

"Why thank you, it is indeed rather lovely today. And I only expect it to be getting better."

"May I ask why is that?"

"Just a hunch."

Just a hunch his ass. He was playing Sanji and enjoying it. But a man's gotta do what he's gotta do. He didn't have to beg. All he had to do was ask nicely. Ask if he had more cigars, or if he was the one who got him the one the cook found. Of course it was him, who else could have been? He should not ask stupid questions. His eyes went back to the man reading up in the tree. The brunette was completely ignoring Sanji, eagerly flipping a page.

"So, what are you reading?" Why did he ask that? He didn't want to know what creepy perverse stories the transvestite reads in his free time.

"The broken eye. It's the third book of the Lightbringer series."

"Never heard of it."

"Really? I think you'd like it."

"What's it about?" He sat at the bottom of the tree, resting his back against the trunk, head down, staring at the grass beneath his feet. There was a moment of silence when Sanji didn't know what to do. He didn't know what he was doing so how was he to plan for future actions. So he sat there, waiting for an answer, hoping it would eventually come. And it did.

"It's fantasy mostly. Magic, prophecies, hero's quest and all…. It's really nicely written and the characters are lovely… I could lend you the first book if you want..."

"Yeas, sure. It sounds… nice." As long as it had no creepy romance in it, he was good with anything.

"Look, Sanji…"

"I'm not going to beg!" He blurred out the words regretting them the second he actually heard them. He was going to pay for that one.

"Fine."

"Fine? Really?"

"Yes, no one is making you beg. After all, no one is giving you anything." He was lost there for a second. The brunette jumped from the tree branch, holding his dress down as good as he could. Still, his legs up to the knees were beautifully exposed, the colorful materiel of the dress fluttering around them. He was already walking away when Sanji realized he could no longer see his legs.

"Jun, wait!" The boy turned around abruptly, holding the book tightly to his chest, pressing it against his fake breasts. Sanji stpped inches away from crashing into him.

"What do you want?"

"… You know what I want…" His voice came out as a plea. He could feel his cheeks already heating up from the embarrassment - he claimed he would not beg, but there he was, seconds away from falling to his knees and pressing his forehead on the ground before the boy's feet.

He wanted to look away, but for some unholy reason he could not stop looking at his face. So delicate and elegant. So cute was the little pout he was making. His big doe-like eyes were filled with that passion, that curiosity that made Jun such a lovable person. His eyebrows knotted in concentration. He was deciding Sanji's fate. The cook felt his hands sweating as the seconds passed.

"I want something in return, you know." The blonds gulped.

"Anyth-"

"Don't say stupid things, you idiot!" He smacked Sanji in the head with his book. Wasn't that what 'Pretty boy' wanted to hear? "Jeez, don't you know anything about negotiations?"

"I thought that would-"

"No, you didn't think! But I guess that doesn't really matter, I already know what I want."

"What is it?"

"I want you… to let me give you a haircut."

"A… haircut?" The cook stares suspiciously at the man in front of him. What has the catch? There had to be a freaking catch, there was no chance he was going to get his cigars that easily.

"And a shaving too." He grabbed his chin between his long fingers and turned his head to the sides inspecting his growing beard. "Do you even look in the mirror?"

"Are you making fun of me?" Sanji slapped the boy's hand from his face.

"No. I'll give you all the cigars that you want in exchange for that." His eyes were gleaming with mischief, but how could Sanji refuse such an offer? He basically had to do nothing. Sit in a chair a couple of minutes until Jun made him bald of give him a mohawk, and then he'd be free of any debt. He was not going to be turned into a slave or perform any humiliating tasks.

"You have a deal."

"Great. Come on!" Jun grabbed his hand and pulled him along.

"Right now?"

"Yes, I don't think I can stand that homeless look for much longer."

Sanji stared at their hands entwined. His own could completely engulf his. For a guy he sure had freakishly small hands. The blonde let himself be guided by the boy, enticed by the diaphanous dress and the bouncing of his beautiful ebony locks. He vaguely heard a door shut and realize he was in 'Pretty boy's' room.

For some reason, Sanji was expecting everything to be…pink. You could only find the cursed color on the walls. Everything else was, for the lack of a better word, normal. No excess of one color – the furniture was wooden beige, the sheets were orange, multicolored pillows, midnight blue drapes and carpet. An entire wall was covered with a bookcase, stacked full. Sanji motioned towards the shelves.

"Have you read all of them?"

"Yeas, some of them more than once."

"You must really like to read…"

"Well, that's an understatement. Do you like to cook?" Jun was with his back towards him, not really waiting for him to answer. The brunette pulled the chair in front of the vanity mirror and looked back at him. "It's my escape. Reading."

"Escape from what?"

"Everything. I start reading and I'm not here anymore. I'm in some far off land where I know that, no matter how bad things get, the main character always wins."

"How do you know you're the main character and not the supporting friend that dies unexpectedly at the end?"

"I know because I'm reading from his point of view. I'm kidding. It's not about who we are in real life, it's about those hours you spend reading when your problems don't matter anymore. When you just take a break from your worries and just enjoy the journey of a good book. Now sit down!"

He rushed to sit on the chair and saw himself in the mirror. Really saw himself. It looked like his hair was trying to run away from him, locks scattered in all directions, curling only at the edges. It was way too long and covered half his face completely. His beard was all kinds of creepy, reminding him of a bush where small animals could hide. His head was one big mop of hair, no wonder everyone stared at him weirdly for the past few weeks. Jun picked up a strand of hair and wrinkled his nose. "This won't do. When did you wash it last?"

"Umh, a couple of days ago."

"With what? Soup? Cola? Come on, let's wash it first."

"What, that was not part of our agreement." The look Jun gave him reminded him of Robin and her death glare. He gulped and nodded, earning a deceiving smile from the brunette. He just wanted to get it all over with and return to the sanctuary of his room.

"It won't kill you. Just sit there and lean your head back." Sanji did as he was asked and sat down on a small laundry box besides the bathtub. Jun sat one hand at the back of his head for support, as warm water started pouring on him. The boy's gentle fingers were massaging his scalp and carefully washing his hair, tempting him to close his eyes. Instead he kept them glued to the boy's face. Such kind eyes. He'd marry her right on that spot if only he were a woman.

After Jun carefully rinsed his hair, he wrapped a towel on his head and ruffled it over his damped mane. When he pushed the towel aside, there was something different on the brunette's face, a sadness he did not like. But it went away, making Sanji unsure if it had been there in the first place.

"Let's get this over with." _He_ came with this stupid idea. Why was he not happy? Sanji agreed to his stupid terms, didn't even put up a fight. The cook sat back on the chair and looked at Jun's reflection in the mirror. Scissors in his right hand and comb in the other, he started chopping at his hair. His usually pouted lips were pushed in a thin line.

"What do you worry about?"

"What?" Jun looked at him in the mirror, hand stopping before he cut another stand of hair.

"You said you read so you didn't have to worry for a while? What unsettles you?"

"Lots of things, Sanji. From big to small, from back-stabbing friends to what color to paint my nails, many things distress me. As they do you, and all of us. We are only human." He must have looked like he didn't agree because Jun scoffed at him and continued. "Don't give me that! You worry too. You've been worked up about your crew ever since we meet."

"That's different. We were not supposed to be separated. And Luffy…"

"It's not different at all. It's one of the unpredictable things life throws at us." There was a small pause, his brown eyes darting back and forth between the scissors and the mirror. "He's all right, you know. Luffy."

"How- You've seen him?" Sanji saw his own face in the mirror practically lighting up the bright flame of his lighter. Luffy was safe.

"Yeah. He's training with Dark Knight Rayleigh."

"Do you know anything about the others?" It was the first piece of information he had about the others since the news paper dropped, some seven months ago.

"No, sorry. I only knew Luffy's location." Jun made a pause and giggled.

"Why are you laughing?" The blonde checked his haircut in a panic, only to see it was actually good. It was a bit longer than his usual style but it framed his face perfectly.

"You'll find out when you meet with your captain. Ah, the irony." Sanji tried to figure it out, but unless the brunette told him, he would never really know. It was related to himself and Luffy and was ironic. The only thing that popped in his mind was that his captain was stuck on an island filled with beautiful women, but that wouldn't be ironic, that would be just sad. Fate couldn't have picked a more clueless man than Luffy to send in such a fictive place of wonders. Maybe he was in a place where woman dressed like men and acted all dark, a perfect parallel to the crazy place he was stuck in. A few more snaps from the scissors and Jun was done, bringing the pirate out of his thoughts.

"You're actually good at this. You've done it before." It came out as a statement, thought he later realized that maybe Jun was talented at hair styling, or it was just beginner's luck.

"Yeah, I used to do it for some of the crew members." He smiled but it didn't quite reach his glistering eyes.

"I'm sorry." Jun looked like he wanted to protest but closed his mouth and then mouthed a 'Thank you.' Whatever good mood the previous conversation got him in was gone. That didn't stop the boy from sitting on Sanji's lap, straddling him. "What do you think you're doing?" Although his voice showed how exasperated he was, Sanji made no move to escape his predicament.

"Shaving this ugly bush." He smiled at him sweetly, holding up some shaving cream and a barber's knife." Sanji paled.

"Where'd you get that?"

"Some barber's shop in the East Blue." He thought at first he was joking but as the boy started applying the cream he doubted he was. How far could he actually teleport? He wanted to ask but the blade touched his skin and he couldn't even gulp anymore.

Jun was surprisingly skillful. Sanji's neck survived without a single nick. The boy's hand kept caressing his skin, resting on the crook of his neck, or taking a better hold of his face. His pristine face was inches away, deep in concentration. His hips moved from time to time when he wanted to take a look from a different angle. He was torturing Sanji and didn't even notice. It was killing the cook from the inside that he was affected so much, when it wasn't even one of the brunette's ploys. He finally closed his eyes when hot breath hit his tender skin. If he kept at it, he'd end up doing something he'd regret.

"Should I leave it like this?" Sanji opened his eyes and focused on his reflection. In the place of his thick beard was a small goatee. "I was going for a van dyke, but it didn't really suit you. This looks more… gentleman, don't you think?" He liked it. It was a change from his usual self, but then again, he was different, was he not? There he was, straddled by a man, and all he could think was how not to fall into temptation and burry his face in the bosom in front of him. His eyes fell to the round, perky breasts inches away from his face. He felt the blood leave his head and travel south. He felt a pit in his stomach and a cloud over his mind.

Jun placed a cold hand on his cheek. It was soothing and he leaned into it without thinking. He let out a sigh when he realized what he was doing and lifted his eyes to meet the boy's. And there it was, that lingering sadness in his beautiful eyes. He smiled that smile that didn't quite reflect in his eyes and went to get up from his lap. But Sanji's hands stopped him, his own traitorous hands clasped around his wrists and pulled the boy back towards him. Jun's eyes widened and his mouth slightly gapped. Ah, such alluring lips. Sanji's breath picked up as one of his hands cupped his face and his thumb traced the bottom of his lower lip, not daring to touch fully it. Still, it was so soft and smooth, so kissable.

And the one thing he was trying so hard to keep under control betrayed him. Jun looked down at his lap and Sanji could pinpoint the moment the boy realized the cook's manhood was pulsing with life between them. The brunette's cheeks turned red instantly. Such a girly reaction, the cook stood no chance. He cupped the boy's face and brought it inches away from his, then stopped. He was about to run away when Jun let out a breath, almost a whimper, the hot air brushing Sanji's lips. The boy looked so vulnerable, brown eyes darting between the cook's lips and eyes. For once, Sanji was in control.

So he took advantage of it.

He crashed his moth hungrily on Jun's and for a moment all the sounds in the world ceased, all except the small moan that came from the brunette. One of his hands went to the back of the boy's head, gripping the silky locks. The other hand circled to his back and pressed the boy flush to him. Jun gasped breaking the kiss, but Sanji just pulled him back in. He felt the delicate hands resting on his shoulders leave and wrap tightly around his neck, like Sanji was a life line he could not let go of. It turned him on more than any of the previous teasing he suffered. Jun needed him just as much as he needed Jun.

The cook could not think a straight though, all he saw was Jun. He was intoxicated. He wanted him closer. He _craved_ him. With every slipping of their tongues against one another, with every little movement of the brunette's hips, with all the heath radiating from his body, Sanji wanted Jun more and more. He bit on his lower lip and felt the body above him shiver. So alluring. Did he ever stand a chance?

Not parting their lips, Sanji's hands travelled down his back and grabbed his ass. A low growl escaped his throat in the kiss as he trusted his hips forward. It felt so right, but he knew, somewhere in his faulty brain, that it was incredibly wrong. Still, he savored every brushing of his skin on the boy's. He relished in the sounds he was making him do. So intoxicating. With only a kiss, Jun stirred things inside of him he didn't knew existed. He wanted the moment to last forever; he never wanted to stop kissing Jun. He pulled his head back, his grip on his hair tightening, and attacked his neck. The brunette was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling. Should he venture down there? Yes, he most definitely should. As his lips trailed down his collarbone, one hand came to grasp one breast. And the magic all ended.

In a second Jun's head snapped forward, dragging the hand fisted in his hair. Sanji saw the black lust leave his eyes and replaced with sheer terror. They stared at one another for what couldn't have been more than 4 seconds, both panting heavily. When Sanji opened his mouth to say something, anything, Jun's eyes widen even more and he vanished. The light around him distorted momentarily and he was gone. Leaving the cook sitting on his chair, in his room, with the biggest boner he's ever had.

'Pretty boy' sure knew how to give a guy a serious case of blue balls.

* * *

So... at first I wanted then not to kiss yet, but then I felt like it was getting kinda annoying for Sanji to keep being so dramatic and just rejecting Jun. I know it was annoying for me to write at least, and I am writing this for fun. So...Kiss!

This being said... this story took a different course than I had initially in mind... hmm...


	8. Chapter 8

So... I feel like I should post a warning but this _is_ rated **M** so I guess I already had

I can't think straight right now... my head is killing me...

I love Jonny Ox!

 _Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

"Because words are not enough,

I will love you with my tongue."

-Jonny Ox

* * *

There were more chances of Sanji running into Luffy on the island than catching a glimpse of Jun. An entire month had passed since he so bluntly kissed the brunette, an entire month without a trace of him. He would've thought the boy was no longer on the island if he hadn't overheard Cherry, the master that was currently training him, talk about some super interesting nail polish Jun had given him. He was still on Momoiro, avoiding the cook like the freaking plague.

It both annoyed and relieved him somehow.

The cook was aware he was utterly confused. He liked the boy. He wanted him besides him, craved to feel his skin of his own. That also scared him. He still loved women. Everything he liked about Jun was feminine and graceful. There was no manly trait to him. So what was it exactly that Sanji needed? If he left the island now and bump into a fair maiden, would he still be infatuated with the brunette?

He sighed, passing his hands trough his hair and resting them on his face. There was no way of knowing until he actually saw a real woman again and that was not happening very soon. In the meantime, his balls were aching. He groaned and hit his head on the wooden table. He was on the patio where everyone usually ate, but no one was there besides him. He finished his training late and by the time he changed clothes everyone was already asleep or partying at Ivankov's castle. It was beyond Sanji how that man had so much energy. The 'Queen' of the Kamabakka Kingdom got wasted every night and still kicked his ass every time he challenged him.

With his forehead pressed against the hard wood, he tried to reason with himself again. He needed to stay focused, get stronger for his nakama and reunite with them in little over a year. He had 52 more masters to defeat and recipes to learn. He had a plan, a trajectory and Jun was _not_ part of it.

Still, no amount of logic was helping him get rid of the pressure in his lower region. It was killing him. He was sure if 'Pretty boy' would just look his way he was going to lose control. Damn, he was probably going to lose it even if he brushed his manhood against something by accident. He smacked his head against the table again. When had he become so desperate? He was used with women rejecting him and was a gentle man with the ones that didn't. So why was it so damn painful when Jun rejected him?

Wait! He didn't reject him, he just… teleported away and never came back to face him. The brunette kissed him back, even grinded against him as he was straddling the cook. So there was no actual rejection involved, no shouting, no slapping or kicking. Was that worse? Was it so bad because Jun teased him for so long he actually never considered the boy was not serious and just playing around because he knew Sanji only liked women? He groaned loudly and threw his head back. The sky was dark, filled with black clouds and no sight of stars or the moon. It was probably going to rain soon. The image of Jun dancing in the pouring rain flashed in his head and he decided he should just go home and try to sleep it off. He almost laughed at himself for how stupid that thought was, as if sleep would help his predicament. But they say hope dies last.

He put out the cigar before closing the door of his room behind him. When he came back from Jun's the day he'd given Sanji a haircut, there were several cartons of cigarettes in his room, casually laying on his floor. He had already burned through one of them so he quickly did the math and saw they will last him at least another four months. He had no idea what he was going to do after that. Maybe he should try and ration them so they'd last longer.

He took of his shoes and jacket, and then loosened his tie. He was not sleepy at all so he stood in the center of the room for a couple of minutes, hands on hips, trying to figure what he was supposed to do. He noticed, at some point, the news paper he had brought in the previous day. As he hadn't had the chance to read it, he thought it was as good a time as any. Leaning back in the chair and placing his feet on the table he flipped the paper open.

The biggest news, that covered several pages, was of course about the bloody Navy. Apparently the fleet Admiral Sengoku stepped down after the war, giving some speech about being too old – a reminder of a long forgotten era. Sanji's eyebrow rose in annoyance. The marines were all a bunch of self absorbed thickheads.

Fliping another page the title read in bold: New fleet admiral. The position had been between Akainu and Aikiji and after 10 days of fighting, Akainu won. Obviously it had to be that bastard that won. Why was fate so cruel to pirates lately? They were doing something wrong. Maybe they should fight harder against the navy and end them once and for all. Or maybe that would only make the matters worse. Anyhow, Luffy was in command and Sanji would follow wherever his overly energetic captain pointed towards. One of many perks of not being in command. Thought, he guessed, Luffy never put much thought on their destination. That's why they had Nami.

He skipped the next pages that gave information about the new fleet admiral and his mighty achievements over the years and reached a fun news. A small island in the South Blue was celebrating their annual festival. There were pictures of dishes impeccably arranged – true culinary masterpieces, and Sanji couldn't help but admire them for a while and brows some of the recipes presented. His eyes traveled over the pictures of joyous people, young and old, decorating their island. On the last photo his breath hitched. Half naked goddesses participating in a dancing competition. All had perfectly sculpted bodies that, if he judged the pictured correctly, were covered in a soft pellicle of glitter. Their hands and legs curved to the music he could almost hear, their flowing hair ran free in the breeze. He concentrated so long on the photo he could swear they started advancing on the paper, moving with rehearsed steps, undulating in the most alluring way.

He needed a shower.

Delusion was not something to joke about. It was one thing to obsess over a living, breathing person, and another to fantasize about pretty pictures, granted that those women actually lived somewhere in the South Blue. Still, seeing dancing photos was not something he wanted to be known for. So he threw the newspaper on the other side of the table and stepped in the shower, his head throbbing vaguely. It was that kind of pain you couldn't really complain about because it was barely noticeable, but still placed a vale of confusion and fuzziness over your eyes.

Faucets turned open and clothes in the basket, Sanji enjoyed the feeling of the warm water on his beaten skin. If anyone asked him a few months ago about the cross-dressers of Momoiro Island, he would have said they were most likely weak. But damn, did they prove him wrong. Ivankov had some pretty tough followers and they were giving Sanji really bad bruises. He was used to the fighting and the training, it was just unexpectedly difficult. He liked to blame it on the moronic frilled dresses he had to wear.

The bathroom was soon filed with steam from the water. While he was washing himself without really paying attention, a long lost memory slithered its was in the front of his mind. A short while after joining the Strawhats, Sanji, accidentally on purpose, saw Nami naked while bathing. The punches he received after scared the memory away from his brain, but now, it was clear as the day he acquired it.

Soap still caressing his skin, he pictured her there with him, her back to him, short damp orange hair twisted on her neck, her hands massaging her body. He made a step closer and the projection turned. Imaginarry-Nami loked flush at first, like a true maiden would when caught in such a vulnerable state. Then she acted like the True-Nami, the glare alone convoying the message of certain death. The imaginary slap he got stung his face.

He never really liked Nami anyway.

She was beautiful and could make some provoking poses that would make any man and some women stare. And he cared for her deeply – she was nakama. But Sanji could never really picture a romance with her anymore. Whenever he would try fantasizing about it, he ended up with both a broken heart and wallet. Plus he knew the shitty marimo had a thing for the navigator. That knowledge alone killed his interest.

Robin was more his type. Though older, she had a mystery to her that most women who enchanted him possessed. She was sweet and carrying, but deadly as any wild predator. Or every subtle poison. Sanji pictured her in the shower in front of him, long dark locks cascading over her shoulders. As a gentleman, he hated objectifying women like he was doing. But a man has needs, and he wasn't hurting anybody, maybe except his sanity. With a little guilt speech in his head finished, he focused on the imaginary brunette. He felt the blood travel down to his aching member. Droplets of steaming water rolled down the woman's skin. She rinsed all the soap foam away and stepped back a little. Sanji's tongue licked his lower lip, an urgency hidden behind the action.

Then Robin turned and she was not Robin. It was Jun's flushed face that stared back at him. A shiver ran hot through his body, his knees almost giving under his weight. Sanji snapped his eyes open and grabbed the soap holder on his right, so he wouldn't hall over the edge of the tub. He took long breathes in an attempt to calm himself, though it was becoming hard with all the steam. He straightened himself and went back under the water jet, warmth engulfing him. He placed his wands on the wall in front and closed his eyes.

He was naked in the shower besides _her_ – Jun, the woman. Was it still Robin's body he was imagining? No, it was Jun's: shorter, with slightly smaller breasts and curvier hips. Had it ever even been Robin's body or did he just conjure Jun's image from the start? That perfect hourglass figure that no man should ever have. Unless it was beneath him. Or on top, he didn't mind. Or pressed against the wall, slender legs wrapped around his waist.

Jun from his mind stepped closer and traced her fingers on his chest smiling playfully, cheeks tainted in red. The water dripping on his skin became soft caresses of her delicate fingers. They reached everywhere, brushing all of his pain away. He gulped when she got closer, a hair's width away. He could feel the hot breath leave her lips and touch his skin. In some obscure part of his brain he knew it was only the stem he was feeling, mixed with his imagination. But he didn't care. Not anymore. He tortured himself for too long. He needed this release.

Lips touched his neck, making him lean his head back. It was nothing more than a passing flutter, but it released a groan from deep within his throat. Her mouth on his neck, her hands all over his body, it was bliss. If only she was really there, he could wrap his arms around her and kiss her and hear her beguiling voice in moans and sighs. Imaginary Jun would have to do. For the moment.

When her hand rested on his manhood, his own followed. Pumping slowly, ever the tease she was, she smiled at him and bit her lower lip playfully. He wanted to grab her by the neck and slam his mouth to hers. Instead, she returned to his neck and shoulders. As she picked up the speed, Sanji could sense her teeth grazing his skin, leaving marks that were not really going to be there.

With the nebulous projected pain in the nook of his neck, his body was ambushed with uncontestable pleasure. His voice was caught in his throat, his mouth agape. It shook him from his core, in a powerful wave that left a delightful tingle in its wake. He leaned his forehead against the tiles. He was still shaking, if only vaguely. It was becoming harder and harder to breath. He closed the water, but not before Imaginary Jun sent him one last look that in his mind said 'Now it's your turn'. He'd love nothing more than to tease Jun, feel her body against his, squirming beneath him, whispering his name.

He shook his head and draped himself in a towel. It was not enough he was crushing over another man. He had to cross another line and have sort-of-sex with said man as if he were a regular woman. He had transformed, devolve into an entirely different Sanji, all in litter over half a year on that hellish island. He threw himself on the mattress and stared at the blank ceiling. He had to set his priorities right, for his crew, and for whatever was left of his sanity.

When he finally closed his eyes again all he could picture was Jun.

* * *

I have no idea where this is going anymore...

well I have the chapters already planned out, sexy quotes and all...

but I feel like I should have ended the story already... or just made it a one shot... I like one shots...

Meh, hope you stick with me till chapter 20 [ that's gonna be last I think... if i don't change my mind about a few things...]

I wanted to tease you guys with the theme of the next chapter... but I'mma just gonna not [ this phrasing makes sense to you? it does to me... ]

ok, I'm off to bed *yawn the hundredth time in the past 15 minutes*

*Hugs & Kisses*


	9. Chapter 9

Well... 'Sorry for not writing in so long' seems to fall short...

This didn't go exactly as I originally planned [dud, since I took suck a long break] but it was surprisingly fun to write.

 _Hope you guys still read & enjoy!_

* * *

There is a great war in me

between the lie that I could forget you exist

and the truth that you are everything there is.

\- Beau Taplin

* * *

The hunted had become the hunter. Between his training and some sleep here and there, Sanji was a full time stalker. He'd take every opportunity to be in Jun's vicinity. He also decided he would refer to his little transvestite with a feminine. It was what _she_ wanted from the start, wasn't it?

He waited patiently for Jun every morning at breakfast, just to stare at her the whole time. Like the lovely lady she was, her eyes widen every single time she'd accidentally catch his eyes, her checks would flush a rosy pink and her eyes would dart back to her plate and stay there until she finished her food. Sometimes she would chew on her lower lip while pretending to listen to the stories the cross-dressers told at her table. But Sanji knew she was also thinking of him. It was obvious when everyone around her would laugh at a joke someone said and Jun just kept starring into space, not even cracking a smile. The knowledge that he had such an effect on her gave the blond pirate a new sense of pride and satisfaction.

After his training he would seek Jun out. It was becoming harder and harder to find her hiding spots, but when he did, he'd torment her as she did him. He'd trap her between his arms and lean in dangerously close to her lips, he'd grab a strand of her hair and play with it, twisting it around his fingers. The problem was her Devil Fruit powers – as soon as he caught her she was gone. He managed to place a soft kiss on the knuckles of her right hand once. He was still a gentleman after all. But he was pretty sure he had caught her by surprise then and was not going to get as lucky again.

Night after night he would pleasure himself all the while thinking about Jun. If pretending felt so good, he could barely wait to actually be skin on skin with her. The anticipation alone was driving him insane with lust. He was a seductive batting of her long eyelashes away from taking her on one of the tables on the patio, or on the kitchen counters, or wherever he found her. But he wouldn't force himself on her. She was going to come to him.

Truth be told, he was annoyed that now that he finally wanted to ravage Jun, she was suddenly acting so bashful. As if it was not her intention from the very beginning to make him fall in love with her. But it didn't matter all that much. He could enjoy a little hunting now that the tables were turned.

Sanji even started going to ore of the late night parties Jun seemed to love so much. After the first one he attended, when his little vixen teleported away the second she saw the cook step on the dance floor besides her and didn't show up the rest of the night, Sanji accepted he should keep his distance. For a short while at least. He would drink with the candies and laugh and watch Jun do the same a little too far from his table.

There was one thing he hated though. He knew it was the alcohol talking, but after a few glasses everyone seemed to want a piece of his Jun. A candy would whisper something into her ear and she would giggle. Another cross-dresser would let his hands roam a little too freely over her body while they were dancing. Someone would call her over while someone else would offer her a drink. He knew they were all transvestites, but they were still men underneath all that pink and glitter.

Watching her leave with her little group of friends, tipsy and walking not quite straight made him want to materialize by her side, drape an arm protectively around her shoulder and make sure she got safely to her room. Tuck her in beneath her blankets and maybe, just maybe, he'd slip right in besides her and fall asleep with her head resting on his chest. All of these were fantasies. Fantasies soon to be made reality.

She'd come around eventually.

And maybe this was the day. It felt like a particularly good day.

Maybe because we was just turning 20. He wondered if anybody knew it was his birthday. He remembered telling a few cross-dressers, Carol-sama included, but he doubted anybody actually took note. It was even less likely they'd celebrate his birthday even if they knew. He was after all not really one of them, no matter how many dresses he was forced to wear and how uh makeup they'd splatter on his face. Still it was turning up to be quite a charming day.

He saw her at breakfast and made her squirm uncomfortably in her chair under his intense gaze. He even picked up another of her habits: she would tuck her hair behind her ear only to release it when she realized she exposed her flushed face even more. It was such a weirdly attractive gesture. He only wished he could be the one tucking her hair away from her face.

He worked out some of his frustration in his daily training. The exhaustion and the dull pain in his muscles helping him to clear his mind on Jun even if only for a couple of hours. He was advancing quickly and soon he would defeat his 62nd aster and learn another famed dish.

A quick cold shower and a snack later he was roaming the streets of Kamabakka Kingdom in search of his little minx. He felt particularly lucky. Maybe if he mentioned it was his birthday he'd get away with a stolen kiss. Or even better, he'd get one as present.

The sun was setting slowly in the distance. Cigar hanging in the corner of his mouth, he wandered around until a hand slapped him on the shoulder.

"Sanji boy, how are you?" Ivankov was trailed by a couple of his candies, all looking pampered and ready for another night of debauchery.

"I'm in a rather good mood. You, Iva-san?"

"Good, good! If you're so jolly why don't you join us on this night of spectacular entertainment?" As much as Sanji hated the parties Iva-san threw in his palace, as they always ended in the morning with everyone drunk or passed out, humping each other or some other form of 'having fun'. Jun was most likely to be there.

"Why not? Let's go."

"I'm so happy to see you're finally letting go of the prejudices you came here with. I remember you in the first weeks after my arrival. You were a mess, Sanji boy." He went on and on about how miserable he had been and how much progress he was making, both in his training and his mentality. Sanji wasn't really paying attention. He had nothing against the cross-dressers per se. He was just confused and angry that they were forcing him to become one too. "I'm sure you'll enjoy the show tonight."

"Show?"

"You just wait and see, birthday boy." He winked at Sanji and pushed him inside. Getting over his surprise that he knew it was his birthday, the Straw Hat cook took in his surroundings. Nothing was out of the ordinary: the scene was placed along an entire wall, tables all over the place in front, a dancing ring at the back and 2 bars on the walls on either sides of the stage. Nobody seemed to give him any more attention than usual either. It was possible that they didn't know ant whatever show Ivankov prepared was going to be a surprise to then too. But most likely they were all in some plot to make him feel miserable and in the end the joke's gonna be on him. Oh, he just couldn't wait to be made fun of once more.

Nevertheless, he took a seat at the bar and ordered a Whiskey Sour. He scanned the room for Jun but couldn't place her anywhere. When the stage lights turned on and Ivankov showed up and rallied the masses into having a good time and drinking more, Sanji was a little nervous, ever expectant for one of those lights to turn on him and something bad to happen. But as the night went on nothing did.

"And now, I hope you all know that today is our Straw Hat Pirate guest's 20th birthday! Happy birthday, Sanji boy!" A roar or cheers sounded and glasses were lifted in his honor. A few closer transvestites came to him and caged him in bone crushing bear-hugs. "The night is still young, let's turn the heat up for our birthday boy! Candies!"

From each side of the stage cross-dressers came in, walking like divas, with their hands on their hips, swinging their bosoms left and right. They were all dressed in matching outfits: a pair of black leather bra, a short, tight skirt, fishnet hoses and stiletto boots. It all looked rather comical to Sanji. At last he would have a good laugh. He almost choked on his Gin & Tonic when a swing came down in the center. Standing tall on it was the only person on that stage dressed like a man: a pair or black pants, held up with those old fashioned suspenders, a white shirt, a cravat and black shoes and a hat that hid most of the face. But there was no way he wouldn't recognize her. Her long black hair held up in a high ponytail, the fabric of the pants tight around her curvy hips, her boobs still obvious under the white shirt.

Jun stepped down from the swing and placed a hand or her hat, tipping it further on her face. She let out a long breath and took her starting pose in the center of the row of cross-dressers.

"Now remember everyone, you're not allowed to touch. Music!"

A jazzy song played loud in the speakers and the dancers started their clearly well rehearsed routine. The blonde cook spared the transvestites on glance before fixing his thirsty eyes on Jun.

The brunette turned and swung, trusted her hips forward in tandem with the others. They were in perfect sink with the exception of small differences: When the candies brushed their 'boobs' with their hands Jun's hand wound travel between her legs, when the candies lifted their skirts Jun would lift the helm of her shirt revealing her stomach. If Sanji wouldn't be transfixed, drinking in every liquid movement of her limbs, he'd probably find the whole scene hilarious – the candies were as bad as women as Jun was as a man.

But he loved watching her no matter how wrong she was doing it. Her movements were supposed to impose, there were supposed to be toned muscles flexing in her arms and strong abs on her stomach for woman to drool over. Instead, her slender limbs and round boobs were making him his blood boil. He finished the rest of his drink in one gulp, eyes never leaving Jun.

The song changed and the dancers spread into the crowd. Sanji's heart skipped a beat as he noticed each candy choosing a 'victim' to dance around and tease. What if his Jun went to another…

But there she was, faced flushed, cautiously walking towards him. The hat was still obscuring her faces, kept forward by her high ponytail. She stopped a hand's length from him and span around. He was terrified for a moment that she would walk away, but she started swinging her hips. She pulled on the suspenders, pretending to take them off but placing them back on. Her hands trailed down her sides and reached for her ass. Grabbing the top helm of the pants she pulled on them and the fabric covering her butt cheeks went off, replaced by a g-string. Sanji closed his eyes. If he survived he night without sexually harassing her he would give himself a reward later. His own pants were becoming tighter by the minute.

When he opened his eyes Jun was facing him. She inched closer. She took her hat off and, swinging her arm around his shoulders, rested it on the back of his head. Her chest was pressed lightly to his, her hips grinding on him. His eyes went down on her lips. She had then pressed shut. It would be challenging to slide his tongue past them.

Placing her hat on his head she pushed herself away from him, exposing her ass to him once more. Jun rolled her head, her hair whipping the air, a silent threat to Sanji whose eyes were glued to her backside. Turning around slowly and seductively, she circled behind him while untying her cravat. Hot breath hit his earlobe making him close his eyes once more. Warmth expanded in his entire body and he had to will himself not to lean back. Delicate hands caressed his arms making his muscles tingle. She reached his wrists and tied the silky cravat around them.

With one hand brushing his back she came back in front of him, giving him another sneak peak of her butt. One button of her shirt had came undone revealing her collarbone. Another button and he could just see the top part of her breasts. Her hands landed on his knees and traveled up his thighs. His manhood tingled in anticipation even if his brain knew nothing more than teasing was going to happen. Jun must have noticed the growing bulge in his pants, her eyes darting away. She sighed and pushed the suspenders off her shoulders, pulling the shirt along with it, revealing more skin.

Sanji was not sure how long he could sit there. He had already tried the poor bindings on his hands and was both pleased and horrified that they were there for show. One effortless pull and the black cravat would fall off his wrists.

Hands traveled on his chest and found their way on the back of his head, her fingernails grazing his skin briefly. His head was pulled forward and his face was suddenly inches away from a perfect set of breasts, partly covered by the white fabric of her shirt. His eyes widen as he realized she was not wearing a bra. There was a sudden urge to cover her up, to take his discarded jacket and wrap it around her waist so no one could see was mean for his eyes only. That urge disappeared the moment he was pulled back up and saw her face.

Flushed and all vulnerable looking, her doe-like brown eyes batting their lashes in the most alluring way, her lips parted just the slightest. Sanji had to blink a few times to reassure himself he wasn't in one of his late-night fantasies. Hands wrapped themselves around his neck, one hand passing his hairline, fingertips brushing his scalp. She inched closer, blowing softly in his ear, her lips brushing his skin as she retreated.

But she didn't get far.

His arms trapped her in his embrace, gently holding her head in place as his lips descended on hers. He held her body pressed to his, savoring every little patch of skin that touched his. She was motionless for a moment before he felt her melting in his arms. Her mouth responded to his, her hands grabbed tighter onto him. He was lost in the moment, the world around him, already unimportant, dissolved completely leaving them the only lovers left alive.

He craved to pull her in his lap. He wanted to pull away from her just for a second and make sure she was real. He wished all of their clothes away. But he was scared his Jun would run away. And just as he was beginning to hope this time she would stay, his little vixen pulled away, breath ragged and lips reddened. Sea Gods, she was beautiful.

He reached a hand to move a strand of hair that fell loose. As he was tucking it behind her ear she disappeared in blur.

"Ntz, ntz, ntz, Sanji boy. I said no touching was allowed!"

* * *

"It is both a blessing

And a curse

To feel everything

So very deeply."

― David Jones

* * *

I can't believe it took me this long to get back to writing this...

Anyways... I compressed the story into 13 chapters... so there are going to be 4 more chapters 'till the end. Yay!

Let me know what you think :3


	10. Chapter 10

Firstly, thank you all for reading and reviewing. You guys make me smile around the house like an idiot *blush* _Sending you all my love!_

Secondly, this was weirdly fun to write :)) [ Sanji, my hommie, I am sooo soooooory! ]

Thirdly, this chapter would've been up sooner if it hadn't taken me half a day to pain my nails like in a photo I found on Pinterest... I'm hopeless...

 **Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

"There are times when your soul makes me forget that you even have a body.

And then there are nights like these when all I want to do is taste the pleasure of your skin."

\- Jonny Ox

* * *

Words seemed to fall short when Sanji tried to describe the torture he was being subjected to. Day after day and night after night he was plagued by his unquenchable desires. His fantasies ran wilder with every passing hour. He could barely remember a time when he went to sleep and didn't wake in the dead of night, out of breath and sweating, the memory of soft lips pressed on his chest feeling all too real.

He was coming back from his sparring session with his next aster when Scarlet-chan approached him. He was probably the most convincing transvestite on the island, besides Jun. He has shorter than most of the candies, with long fiery red hair that was always kept in some intricate braids and mesmerizing green eyes. He was also one of the few cross-dressers that actually shaved their legs. He was in no way fooling anybody he was a woman anytime soon though. But Sanji had to give him credit for the effort.

"Hello, Sanji."

"Ah, hi, Scarlet."

"How is your training going? I heard you defeated Evelyn-chan." They fell into a slow walk side by side. The pale baby-blue dress that the Straw Hat cook had to wear that day was clinging uncomfortably around his left shoulder, parts of it sticking to his back with sweat.

"So far so good." He rolled his shoulders to relieve some of the tension in his muscles and maybe set the damn fabric of the dress right. They arrived at the small house that belonged to the transvestite and Sanji bowed his head goodbye. He got four steps ahead when the candy spoke to him in a serious voice.

"You look so tired. I know some techniques that will do wonders to your muscles." His hand traveled to his shoulder. A massage did sound good. And something in the way the man was holding himself and talking gave Sanji the unfounded certainty that he was a no-bullshit kind of guy. The cook eyed the cross-dresser a while longer though, still half-expecting his blank face to turn into a crazed grin.

"Wonders you say?"

"I guarantee tension-free muscles in only a couple of minutes." A small smile played on the man's lips and it was reflected in his eyes. Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea, a few minutes of suffering followed by no more pain every time he flexed his limbs.

"Why not? Lead the way." Scarlet opened the door and showed Sanji into the small living room. He gestured for him to sit on the armchair while he light incense. It smelled wonderful, some flower the cook remembered finding on the pink island.

He was somewhat surprised when the hands that took a hold of his shoulders were gently, but firm at the same time. He felt Scarlet's thumbs roll about a spot on his upped back, almost immediately dulling the ache beneath his skin. He closed his eyes, enjoying the pampering, his body relaxing more and more with every stoke and squeeze the cross-dresser placed on him. Scarlet went on and rubbed at his arms, making Sanji realize just how much the bruises he received that day stung.

Lips were pressed against his shoulder blade and he jumper to his feet. Scarlet chuckled, placing two fingers on his red lips.

"There's a lot of build-up tension in you, Sanji." He took a step forward and the cook backed away, his thighs bumping into the table. "Why don't you let me get rid of that, too?" A hand traced the collar of his baby-blue dress, playing with the ruffles. Sanji's first instinct was to bolt out the door and fide in his room. But _what if_ … it would help? With his frustrations, with what he should expect with Jun once she gave into him.

His hands circled Scarlet and he closed the space between their faces. His mouth moved against the pump one of the cross-dresser. He almost cringes when his tongue darted across his lower lip. He was about to pull away when Scarlet pushed him down on the table. Sanji let out a surprised squeak, his ears burning at the sound that escaped his throat.

Hot breath reached his ear and he shut his eyes shut as it that would make Scarlet disappear. It actually made things worse. As the gentle nibble on his earlobe sent a shiver down his body, images of Jun flooded his mind. Her hands were caressing his arms, her lips were kissing and sucking on his neck. His head fell back, exposing more skin. His breath quickly became ragged.

When he was pushed back on the table, his hands brought above his head, a half-sigh half-moan erupted from his chest. His skin was delighted to feel actual human contact. No more dreamland encounters with Jun, he finally had the real deal.

The skirt of his dress was being lifted painfully slow, eager fingers brushing along his inner thighs. His mind was racing, back arching whenever teeth would graze that sweet spot on his neck. The ruffles of his dress were pooling at his waist, nails skimming the skin just above the helm of his boxers, pulling on the elastic ever so slightly. Hips were pressed against his, his now hard cock brushing against another.

His eyes snapped open, the magic dispelling as fast as it began. Jun's black teasels turned a deep red, her big brown eyes became a vivid green, the soft angles of her face sharpened. Bile rose in his mouth, the muscles in his neck and shoulders taunting so fast it gave him a painful cramp.

"Stop it! Get off of me!" He pushed Scarlet away with both hands and got up from the table in a haze. He darted towards the door not really hearing what the transvestite was shouting after him. The sunlight hurt his eyes even if he had been indoors for less than an hour. As he made his way to his room at a fast pace a few candies pointed his way, trying and failing to stifle their laughs. It was then that Sanji realized the state of the stupid dress he was wearing. The left shoulder hanged awkwardly, ruffles ripped and stained red. The crumpled skirt was caught in the helm of his boxers at the font, revealing little scratch marks along his legs. It dawned on his quickly that he was on the walk of shame.

He broke into a run, tears welling up in his eyes. What was wrong with him? He felt like a teenage girl that just lost her virginity to a jackass, and nothing even really happened between him and Scarlet. Still, he felt the scrutinizing stares of the transvestites as he passed them. From the corner of his eyes he could have sworn he saw Jun's orange summer dress but he didn't dally to make sure. When he entered his room, tears were streaming down his face.

Sanji went straight to the bathroom. He felt dirty, despicable. Tainted! He needed to get out of those clothes. A bath and a cigar, that's what he needed. When he saw his reflection in the mirror he broke into sobs. The right side of his neck was smeared with red lipstick and little bruises. His own pink lipstick was tarnished on his jaw. Some black eyeliner or whatever was applied on his eyes had run down his cheeks with his tears.

He was a mess. In that blue ruined dress, with makeup soiling his entire face and neck. He felt used and alone. So utterly alone. His back hit the tiles on the wall and he slid down, bringing his knees up to his face and hugging them.

What would his crew think of him? He was nothing more than a common whore! No, they wouldn't judge. They'd break a few laughs, but non ill-intended.

What would Jun think of _Sanji,_ _the grande horizontale_? Yes, that should be his new wanted poster name. How fitting! Jun would surely be disgusted. As if things weren't already messed up between them. Was there even a 'between' or a 'them' or was it all just in his delusional brain?

While he was sulking on the bathroom floor, he didn't immediately notice the figure standing in the doorway. An invisible hand reached into his chest and ripped his heart out when saw Jun, her eyes trailing over his foul body, widening when all the vulgar details registered in her head. The blonde cook wanted to cover himself as her mouth opened and remained hanging in surprise.

"I…um… you ran past me and…"

"Go away." He hid his face in his hands and rested them on the top of his knees. "Please…" The last thing he needed was for Jun to see him like that. But there she was in all her orange chiffon dress glory. There was a small rustle in the air and when he lifted his head she was gone. He barely got to let out a sigh, when she came back, a small white bag in her hand.

Before he could protest anymore or turn his face away, she was kneeling in front of him. She grabbed his jaw a little harsher than he would've expected and starts wiping the makeup away with some wet tissue she produced out of her bag.

He took in all of her features, her lips pressed in a thin line, her slightly furrowed brows, the way her nose would wrinkle every now and then as she scrubbed at his neck. Her eyes were still one of the most enchanting things he found in her. Even angry as she clearly was, her eyes held a light to them, a calmness that tickled his soul.

Ever the tramp he was, he could only think of much he wished she's lean in just a little closer, press her body against his filthy one. But he restrained himself. Her hands cleaning away his sins would have to suffice.

"Get up." She was already standing, hands stretched to help him rise. He took them reluctantly, craving the contact but fearing she's run away. She strolled into his bedroom, leaving him standing there for a few seconds. When she came back, Sanji saw her place his pajamas on the towel holed. "You should take a shower…" Silence. She stared him in the eyes and he stared back. He wondered what was going on in that beautiful head. The look she was giving him could have meant anything. Pity? Kindness? Oh, how he wished it was _love_. Or at least a strong like. But he was sure it was a feeling more akin to disdain than compassion. She cleared her throat.

"Oh, yes. Um… could you help?" He turned around displaying the array of button on the back of the dress. Sanji thought for a moment that she had left again when she didn't make a sound. But as she was about to face her, he felt her hands working on the buttons. With each one her fingers became clumsier, taking longer as she made her way down. When the last button was freed the dress fell of his shoulders with a mind of its own. He froze in place, breath caught in his throat. He was standing in his boxers only with his back to Jun. His mind blanked completely, a shiver running down his spine when she sighed behind him, a hot whisper of air reaching his skin.

"I'll get you something to eat. Take your time."

He was sure she was long gone by the time he finally gathered the guts to look towards the closed door. She was gone, with the promise of coming back with food. He stepped in the shower thinking of how not hungry he was. The prospect of Jun returning made him anxious, though.

He rubbed the soap all over his body, washing away his shame along with the sweat and dirt. There was still a pang of guilt, a hollow in his stomach that threatened to make him barf. But the warm water calmed him like a weak anesthetic. He washed his hair last, his head feeling instantly lighter despite his soaked blond mane.

The fabric of his pajamas was rough compared to the dress he previously wore. He liked it. Eyeing the discarded blue cloth, he pushed it in a corner with his foot. Then he walked out of the bathroom, towel ruffling his hair dry. The corners of his lips lifted automatically when he saw Jun sitting on the edge of his bead, a tray of food on his nightstand. She stood up and made room for him to get in bed.

Complying, he did just that, moving slowly as if any wrong gesture would startle the wild doe and she'd hop away. He sat on the middle of the bed, his back pressed on the pillows. Eyelids were becoming heavy, his puffy eyes asking for rest. Jun placed the try on the mattress next to him, sitting back on the far edge of the bed.

"I didn't know what you felt like eating… I got a little bit of everything I could find…" He scanned the tray: there was some steak, fried potatoes, little meatballs in a super spicy sauce, garlic toast, olive toast and whole wheat toast, an eggplant with tomatoes, different pizza slices, pies and cookies of all sorts and a bunch of fruits. He was not hungry at all.

Sanji picked a strawberry and shoved it in his mouth.

When Jun sighed he realized he had been chewing on the poor thing for a while. The brunette placed the tray on his nightstand without a word. He watched her, swallowing hard the contents in his mouth. When their eyes met Sanji couldn't take his eyes away, even if, at the same time, he wanted to pull the covers over his head like a child.

"Do you want to… talk about it?" His yes must have gotten as big as the plates she had brought him. He would very much hate talking about it with her.

"Not really, no…" Jun nodded and went to get up from the bed. Panic rushed trough him, his hand jerking forward on its own accord.

"Stay!" The single word came out a lot more desperate than he wanted. He was holding his breath, waiting for an answer.

Doe-like eyes darted to where his hand was gripping her wrist and Sanji knew he had an effect on the brunette too. At least she was considering not abandoning him in his hour of need. He felt giddy on the inside. When she sighed and shifted closer to him on the bed he finally exhaled, his lips curling in a small smile. He watched with sheepish eyes, not sure what he wanted to say or do, he just wanted her there. Jun in turn had one eyebrow curve upwards.

"Thank you." It was the first thing that came to mind, but as soon as he blurred the words out he felt his cheeks heating. He didn't want to bring back the subject to his little breakdown, nor to his shameful experience with Scarlet. Jun was going to find out all about it from the other cross-dressers anyway.

The brunette didn't reply for a while. Instead she let her back fall on the mattress, laying on her back besides him. Sanji stood perfectly still, emptying his mind from any inappropriate thoughts. Surely she wasn't implying nor proposing anything with the simple action. He scooted down from his pillows and lay on his side facing her, keeping a respectful distance from the body he dreamed of cradling.

"I'm sorry." She finally breathed out the entire phrase in one compact syllable. "I fell like this is all my fault."

"What are you talking about?"

"If I… If I hadn't teased you so much…" She turned on her side too, one hand placed on her chest, where her heart was. Sanji shook his head.

"It's not your fault."

"But what if-"

"No 'what ifs'! He took her hand in his and placed a kiss on her knuckles. It was something he'd done so many times to so many different women, it became a habit. But Jun let out a small gasp. She was blushing, her eyes fixed on the door. Not that she needed to use it to 'escape' him. An idea formed in Sanji's mind, something that might just get her to stay. "But…"

"What?" She was startled by his voice. Her sad eyes met his and the blonde cook was encouraged to do his best to keep her by his side for the night.

"If you do feel responsible…" He tested the waters, watching if her expression changed. But Jun kept looking deep into his eyes, waiting for her chance to atone for her imaginary crime. "… you _could_ make it up to me."

"How?"

"Stay here tonight."

"Sanji… you don't really want that… I don't think it would help…"

"You can't possibly imagine…" He let out a breath and closed his eyes, bringing the hand he still held captive a little closer to him. He wasn't expecting her to say yes, but she didn't exactly say no either. Still, the words hurt him. Wasn't it clear enough to her that he wanted nothing more in that moment than to hold her?

"…fine…"

"What?" Had he heard her right? He was smiling like a fool even if he wasn't entirely sure she had accepted his out-of-the-blue proposal, the mere idea of having her all to himself thrilling him to no end.

She turned with her back to him, but he still saw her cheeks burning red. "I said 'Fine!'"

Not able to contain himself, Sanji closed the space between them, wrapping his arms possessively around her. Her body went rigid. He was scared for a moment she would disappear like she did so often. But she relaxed just barely, placing her hands over his.

A million different kinds of joy invaded him. He was holding Jun. In his arms. In his bed. Oh, if she knew how many dreams he'd had of her on that very mattress, how many nights he'd spent wide awake, unable to get her out of his head.

His arms held onto her a little tighter. Jun was his. He buried his nose in her silky hair, taking in the sweet smell of her shampoo. He was slowly loosing himself, her body next to his – a powerful drug. He reached her neck and planted his lips on its back. She shivered in his embrace. Gods! He'd make her tremble beneath him every night if only she let him.

"Sanji!" Jun moved to release herself from his grip.

"Please don't go! I'll behave." He gripped her dress tightly between his fingers and she settled back. He'd be patient a while longer. Just a little longer.

He no longer cared if Jun was a man, or was a man before Ivankov and his crazy Devil Fruit powers. The brunette could even turn out to be a living corps, or some weird ass soul-sucking succubus.

He was in love.

Madly.

Without knowing when exactly it happened, or how, or why. All he knew was that it was _Sanji_ who was going to make her smile. _He_ would be the one next to whom she'd be sleeping every night. It was _his name_ she would moan in ecstasy on the same nights.

"I don't care anymore. Man or woman or whatever you choose to be… I just… don't push me away anymore."

* * *

"And I can't be running back and forth forever between grief and high delight."

\- J.D. Salinger

* * *

Ok... 3 more chapters :D

Before I go... is anyone reading the manga? I swear I'm going to have a heart attack if Oda doesn't reveal what the bloody hell happened to Sanji!

Anywaaaaays, see you guys in 2016 :*

 **Wish ya'll a Happy New Year!**


	11. Chapter 11

Here's the last chapter from Jun's point of view.

 **Hope you guys like it!**

* * *

"I hope what I have awakened in you, devours me."

-Jonny Ox

* * *

He watched her with lust-filed eyes. Everywhere she went, his eyes would follow. He looked at her like he was already fucking her inside his head, making her shiver every single time. He glared at whoever she was talking to, like she was already _his_. Like he'd made some kind of claim over her. It both freaked her out and turned her on.

What had she done?

Wasn't thins what she wanted from the very start? To make him fall for her? So completely he would overlook the fact she was not a 'lady'. He didn't seemed to care now, so what was keeping her away?

She'd be lying to herself if she ever claimed not to be attracted to Sanji. From the moment her eyes landed on him she felt the pull. Then he kissed her hand like the gentleman he was and made her knees go weak. Why was she such a hypocrite now? She actually liked this possessive version of him quite a lot.

Jun felt his eyes on her and wanted to cry. Scream at him to stop staring at her every waking hour! Slap herself for not giving into his charms. She could teleport them both in his room or hers, directly on the bed and make love to him until they could move no longer.

She craved him and he was willing, no longer squirming under her every touch. He wanted her too. But who exactly did he want: Jun the cross-dresser that went out of his way to tease and seduce him or Jun the woman with whom he had little to no contact.

The sad fact was she didn't understand what triggered him so abruptly. First he was so disgusted by her, as if she had some disease that he could catch. Then he pinned her down and teased her. He would seek her out and tram her in his arms.

And then there was that night she spent with him. She was still uncertain of what exactly had transpired between him and Scarlet-chan, but from what the transvestite told her it wasn't much: some kisses and some groping here and there.

But then he pulled her in his bed and he fell asleep holding her so tight. The sheer memory of it brought goose bumps on her skin. Every time she went to sleep since then she pictures him besides her, holding her protectively in his strong arms, caressing her hair, kissing the back of her neck. Oh, damn that mouth of his!

She lifted her eyes unconsciously and saw Sanji grinning her way from across the patio. Brows furrowed instantly, but she knew she was already red as a freaking lobster. She wondered shortly if wearing the vivid red colored dress helped or made her blushing worse.

"Jun, are you alright?" Inazuma was drinking from his glass besides her. Jun saw him as a woman quite a few times, but it always seemed strange to her.

"I've been better… How about you, Inazuma?"

"Oh, I can't remember the last time we had so much fun on the island. Between all the parties and watching _you two_ run away from one another there was little time for anything else." He took another graceful sip from his glass.

"You're being mean!" Jun pouted, something she rarely did. Or at least she thought so. She was only conscious of her pouted lips and crossed arms when she saw Sanji from the corner of her eye rise from his seat. She turned and saw him glaring daggers at Inazuma. The transvestite chuckled.

"See? It's rather entertaining." He styled a loose strand away from Jun's face and behind her ear. Sanji was fuming in the background, probably pondering whether he should come closer and punch poor Inazuma away. "But I have to ask, Jun, why are the two of you not an item yet? He seems… less sickened by the sight of you."

"I feel like… I'm not really sure..."

"You must have an idea. You tried for so long to make him like you. And now, when he's wrapped around your little finger, you push him away. Why?"

That was a good question.

"I'm scared."

"Love is scary. You're giving to someone else the power to hurt you. "

"I've been _in love_ before. And it almost killed me once. Literally! I was imprisoned. You remember Impel Down, don't you?" She trembled at the memory of her past foolishness and stupidity.

"Oh? You never told us how exactly you got there. Only that there was some backstabbing involved."

"That's a story for another time. The fact is… I _am_ in love. And that makes me trust the person completely. I give myself away in this love and let it consume me. But it's just _so painful_ when the one you feel so deeply towards doesn't feel the same."

"So you fear Sanji doesn't love you back?"

"I _know_ he doesn't. I've heard rumors about 'Black Leg' Sanji and his flirtatious ways. He'll get off the island and see other damsels in distress and run to them the first chance he gets. And I'm going to be left behind, with my heart on my sleeves, broken and bleeding like every other time."

"You don't give him enough credit, Jun."

"Do you truly believe a man that flirts with every pair of boobs is capable of loving me fully in return?" She waited for him to reply, but Inazuma said nothing. "That's my point exactly. I give all my love and expect the same in return. In the end, I'm going to suffer. I just… don't know if the momentary high is going to be worth all the pain that's gonna come after."

They stood in silence for a while. Jun finished eating her lunch, trying hard not to look at the blonde cook. He was wearing those short training shorts, showing his legs perfectly. She bit her tongue once when she almost stole a glance of his muscular limbs.

"There's a way you could test that."

"What?"

"I could ask Iva to turn the candies that agree into women for a night."

"What?" Jun was dumbstruck. What could she test? How? _What?_

"We could have a masked ball." Inazuma looked all dreamy and sighed a little. "If Sanji flirts with other women you'll have your answer."

"But… He's been here for more than a year now, he'll recognize the candies. Then he'll pick me out on whim. He still thinks I'm only a woman because of Iva, you know?" The transvestite chucked again, bringing his hand to his mouth in a lady-like manner.

"He's a darling. I can't wait for him to realize you were a woman all along."

"Pff, I don't think that's ever gonna happen. I explained it to him plainly a hundred times. Sanji's very stubborn."

"Even when you claim he's so infuriating, you still blush every time you say his name."

"I-I most certainly do not!" But Jun felt her ears burning. She was grateful for her messy hair that was covering them a bit.

"You're hopeless. Might as well jump in with all you have. You know what they say. _'It's better to regret what you have done than what you haven't.'_ "

" Hmm… What about _'Better safe than sorry'_?"

" ' _Better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all'_ "

"I disagree there. I've been on that losing end…it ain't no picnic."

"Fine. I have another. _'A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.'_ "

"I'm not a ship."

"But we're all made for love."

"Some more than others."

"There's no wining with you…" Inazuma jugged the contents of his glass and got up. "Look, all I'm trying to say is that there is clearly something there between you two. It would be a shame to miss on that because you're scared, because of a past lover that Sanji has nothing to do with." He patted her on the shoulder then left.

Jun knew he was right. She was pushing him away because she feared he was the same. But wasn't he? He had a reputation of a perverted flirt. She asked around and found out some of his crew call him ero-cook. What did that tell her about him? He claimed to be a gentleman, but weren't actions louder than words?

And for the sake of the argument, she could say those flirts were meaningless, as they probably were. Could she ignore them? Could she look him in the eyes and tell him it doesn't bother her at all? Does she even have the right to be bothered? Or to ask him to stop when it was clearly in his nature?

"Jun? Are you listening? You ignoring me again?"

"Huh?" She lifted her head and her heart skipped a beat. He has that cigar ever plastered between his lips. He dragged from it and exhaled the smoke to the side. He was watching her curiously, standing on her left.

"Hmm, I wonder what thoughts were running so wild trough your head, Jun-chan?" So she was _'Jun-chan'_ now? No more _'Pretty boy'_ or _'you creep'_?

"I'm sorry. It's just something Inazuma and I were discussing. I didn't get what you said, though."

"I… um… wanted to talk to you." Oh, Gods, he was flustered. She wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him and kiss him. Instead, she righted her position, keeping her back straight, her shouldered drawn back and her eyes on a peculiar spot on the table."

"Uh, talk? Sure, we can talk."

"Walk with me?"

"Why can't we talk here?" She risked looking at him and he gestured around. It finally hit Jun that all the candies had stopped whatever they were doing and were paying the utmost attention to their conversation. "Oh." It was all she could say.

"So… Shall we?" There was always a chance he was trying to fool her. But then again, no matter what he plotted, she could always just zap away in her room.

"Fine. Lead the way." She thought for a moment she could choose the path and keep them on the more busy places of the island, but she decided to give the cook the benefit of the doubt. After all, wasn't that what she always did when she was blindly in love?

They walked in silence and Jun was half-surprised he wasn't taking her in any weird places. He was taking them towards the castle's garden. Jun loved it there, it was so filled with color and life and it smelled wonderful. His he knew that? Was that the plan somehow? Swoon her with his gentlemanly ways?

By the time they passed the garden's gates, Sanji had inched closer. She felt her skin tingling with anticipation. Would he push her up against that tree? Or pull her on his lap on that bench? There was a labyrinth up ahead where they could go and no one would find them. Her treacherous mind was playing scenarios while she sort of realized he was most likely thinking of none of them.

Their hands brushed as they walked and she almost jumped out of her skin. His warm hand engulfed hers, holding it gently. Jun turned her head away, but didn't pull away. She had no strength in her arm. It was rendered to jelly the moment he touched her. She was blushing like crazy, her heart was screaming to her to turn around and claim his lips.

"Jun…" He stopped, her hand still in his. She made another step before her feet took roots at the sound of _her_ name wearing _his_ voice. She turned slowly, not sure of what to expect. He came closer and pushed a strand of hair away. She looked into his eyes and was lost in them: they bore all kind of emotions, swirling in them like his perfect eyebrows. Sadness. Hope. Adulation. And maybe, just maybe, _love_.

"Sanji…" She saw him sucking air in, bracing himself for whatever cruel verdict she was preparing. Had she been so diabolical? What was it she wanted to tell him, though?

When no other words came out of her, he gained courage. She saw the change in his eyes, the way his pupils dilated. His free hand cupped her cheek and he leaned in. But it was Jun herself that closed the space between them. It was her hand that snaked around his neck and pulled him in. She knew it was her. She knew she was too far gone down that rabbit hole.

Their lips met and they were soft and warm and exactly how she remembered them. She clung tighter to him, entwining their fingers together. With all the pent-up lust they were holding, the kiss was fated to be anything but sweet. Somehow it managed to surprise her. Sanji wasn't pushing her, his hands were not roaming her body, his tongue not invading her mouth.

Instead he pulled away and opened his eyes. He had his dreamy look on his and it was doing bad things to her resolve. Jun was pretty sure he could lift the skirt of her dress and take her right there on the grass and she wouldn't lift a muscle to stop him. A cute smile played on his lips, as he kept staring at her lovingly, his thumb caressing her cheek.

"I think I love you, Jun!" He blurred out the words so unexpectedly. She pulled away and saw the hurt in his eyes. Damn it! The last thing she wanted was to cause him pain. She'd never expected to fall for the Straw Hat pirate _so hard_. But she couldn't go through another heartbreak. Not again! Not after the last one had cost her so much. So she closed her eyes and turned away.

"No you _don't_. I'm just here and I'm convenient."

* * *

"She wore her scars

as her best attire.

A stunning dress

made of hellfire."

\- Daniel Saint

* * *

Sooooo, 2 more chapters.

There's a masquerade ball coming up. tee hee

*Hugs*


	12. Chapter 12

Err...

 **Hope you enjoy?**

* * *

" 'You're beautiful.' I said, all breathy and nervous. 'You could be standing in the center of a star and still be all I see. _'_ "

-Beau Taplin

* * *

' _No you_ don't _. I'm just here and I'm convenient.'_

The words repeated over and over again in Sanji's head, long after Jun vanished. He stared at the empty air she had been moments before. All flushed and beautiful. He could still picture her half-lidded eyes staring back at him. He could smell her perfume lingering on his t-shirt. What was that scent? The first things that came to mind were sparkling green mandarin and aquatic notes of water jasmine. Her fragrance alone made his thoughts run wild.

And she was gone. Again. Out of sight, but not out of mind.

' _I'm convenient'_ What made her think that way? She was marvellous. No one could replace her. Sure, she was the only woman-looking cross-dresser on the island. And sure, Sanji made it abundantly clear in the beginning that he was disgusted by the notion of loving a man, and that the sight of her repulsed him… Okay, maybe he saw where the problem was.

But what could he do? How could he make her see he had changed? That _she_ had changed him. He kicked the closest tree to release some of his frustration, ripping its roots from the ground and sending it flying away. He had been so infuriatingly stupid! How many times had he insulted her? Belittled her and her friends. She was never going to trust him again.

No! He couldn't think like that. He would make her see… He would shamelessly beg if he had to. Drown her in attention. Bring her food cooked specially for her. He would have eyes only for her. He'd bring her gifts and flowers. He knew what she liked and disliked. His stalker side had taken notes about her every preference, all that information stored in his head. Yes! It would work. It had to!

But days passed with no trace of his beloved. It was driving him mad. He had developed an entire plan to gain, if not her trust, her attention. All he needed was another chance. Just one. But she had disappeared He knew she was still on the island, he had heard some transvestites talking about her: how she helped with this, how she said that. Jun was just nowhere in his vicinity. She was probably making sure of it.

The memory of their last encounter was etched on his skin. He had held her in his arms, kissed her velvety lips, breathed in her perfume. And then he had to open his mouth. But what he said was true, he loved her. She was always in his thoughts and it was painful when she was not around. Which was always! He banged his head on the patio table. He was doomed. And it was all his fault.

"Sanji-boy!" The King of the Okama stood before him in all his glory, giant smile plastered on his equally giant head. He pushed a poster in Sanji's face and he was forced to take it.

"Iva-san. What is this?"

"There's a masquerade ball tonight. Be there!"

He had half a mind not to go. A room filled with men in fluffy dresses and masks didn't really appeal to him. The only thing that made him get up from bed later that evening, shower and get dressed in a nice suit was the possibility of Jun being there. All dressed up and pristine. Even a glimpse of her would bring joy to his aching heart. He fixed the thin black mask on his face before leaving his room. It was a really pointless thing that mask; he was going to be the only one in pants. But he guessed he could at least play along and wear it.

He entered the pink castle already wanting to turn on his heels and go back to sulking in his room. He had to remind himself a few times as he went up the white marble stairs that Jun could he in the large ball room. If he was lucky he would get a dance. Ah, an opportunity to hold her in his arms again. He knew something was off from funny stares the few cross-dressers he met on the way were giving him. But Jun was just beyond those doors! He pushed them open and his heart almost stopped.

Women! Women everywhere. The light giggles were a dead give-away. He beamed at the sight of thin little waists, perfectly curved eyelashes and excessively pushed-up breasts. The large skirts of their dresses were swaying on the dance floor, as the dames danced in pairs. Laughter like jingling bells and chirping birds. Sweet flowery smells filled the room, vanilla and roses and lilies.

Hell turned Heaven.

Blood sprouted from his nose as if from a faucet when a lady near him leaned to pick something up and revealed more of her bosom. He quickly swept his nose with a handkerchief and was at the woman feet in a matter of seconds.

"My lady!" He kisses her hand, soft and warm. Lifting his head he saw beautiful green eyes beneath the mask, made to pop out by the faint make up and the ornate mask. He went to speak but was distracted by a shattering noise.

"Opps! How clumsy of me…" He lifted his eyes and saw a woman in a sleek one shouldered dress, with a slit that went all the way up her thigh. He was by her side in an instant.

"Let me." He swept the broken glass in his handkerchief and discarded them in an ashtray so he could be by the beauty's side. "Can I get you something else to drink, my flower?"

But she didn't get a chance to answer. His eyes caught on something glittering. It was then that he saw her. The most beautiful creature ever to walk the earth. She was dripping gold, in a tight strapless dress. The helm of it was ruffled, giving the skirt a mermaid tail effect. Her skin had this marvelous glow to it. Her lips were painted the most vivid red he'd ever seen. It was drawing him in. He took her gloved hand with care and placed a kiss on her knuckles.

"Would you offer me a dance, my princes?" He kept his head bowed as he waited for an answer. The celestial being didn't answer immediately, she calculated her words. When she did speak, her voice was a lullaby.

"Are you sure it's me you want to dance with?"

"Who else could measure you in beauty?" He lifted his eyes and took in the features of her face that he could see behind her golden mask. Blonde hair fell in a waterfall of curls, glitter woven in it in thin braids. It was mixing with her dress perfectly. A beauty mark was beguiling him from above her crimson lips. And her eyes! Even in the sunniest of days, the sky would've been jealous of that pure blue.

But the woman gave him a confused look. Had he said something weird? He didn't think so. He extended his hand, another silent offer. She burrowed her eyebrows, but took his hand. It took Sanji all the focus he could spare from the woman to keep the blood from spilling all over him.

The song was slow, so he got bolder and pulled her close to him. She squeaked like a blushing bride and held onto him for support. So cute. With their hands in position, he led her in a slow rhythm. One, two three. One, two, three. Her cheeks were flustered and she kept looking at him then away. She batted her long eyelashes seductively. She was a work of art, a statue came to life, a painting walking among simple sketches. His left hand left her waist and cupped her cheek, caressing the silky skin with his thumb.

"I'm sorry. You're just so beautiful I can't stop myself... Would you grant me a kiss, my angel?"

"If that is what you truly want…"

Their lips met, and at first, it was all he thought it would be: sweet and warm, sending flutters down his skin. The next thing he knew there was a hollowing pain crushing at him, as if he'd been stabbed in the back. He sound of tears falling on the cold marble floor echoed in his ears. He parted from the angel before him. Her lipstick was slightly marring her pale skin, her eyes looked at him with disappointment.

Sanji left the dance floor and made his way through the mass of pampered women, guided by the agonizing sound of maiden tears. He passed glamorous faces with intricate masks and stunning dresses: long and short and heavy and some that barely covered anything. But he couldn't hear anything past the drumming noise in his years.

He found himself standing in front of tall balcony doors. Violent sobs could be heard from beyond them. He readied himself mentally to aid the damsel in distress and went in the cool night air. She was sitting on a bench, her back to the door. Sanji took note of the fallen black mask and broken champagne glass that stood under said bench. She was wearing an elegant dress, tight on the waist and flowing down her legs. Black velvet. Classy.

He took another step and froze. The scent of water jasmine filled his nose almost making him choke his sinful heart out. The next thing he noticed was her hair, shiny and beautiful and black as her dress. He knew those silky tassels, he'd touched them, buried his face in their softness. He still dreamed of that one night when he fell asleep on them, the soothing smell of her shampoo filling his lungs.

 _How could he save the damsel if he was the cause of her distress?_

Mare hours ago he was trying to figure out a way to make her see he was a changed man, a loyal, loving gentleman. And the second he saw other women he went around kissing and dancing with them, offering drinks and other debaucheries. She'd been the only thing he could think about only to be completely pushed out of his mind when he saw another woman. Was he that shallow?

 _What was wrong with him?_

Her sobs died down. But her tears were still streaming. He felt them even if he couldn't see her face. Each teardrop tore at his very soul, each one - a thick needle piercing his heart. He stretched an arm out towards her, but quickly retracted it. He was probably the last person she wanted to see. But he couldn't just leave. She had to know he was sorry. She had to see he was still in love with her. Only her! He was a flirt, yes. He had a weakness for pretty faces, yes. But he needed only her.

What a poignant excuse to be a douchebag…

He was just a pervert. He was no gentleman, who was he trying to fool? He was a sad excuse of a man. A daft cretin. The bastard that made Jun cry. His Jun!

Sanji's eyes watered. His knees collapsed underneath him. He fell to the floor, arms outstretched to support him and his mask fell with a rattling sound. He was a filthy, filthy creature. His breathing picked up, tears fogging his view of the white tiled floor. He managed to upset the one person he desired most. Made her mar her cheeks with rows of tears. He had no right to be in the same room as Jun, breathe the same air. He heard a gasp. He knew it was her, but he couldn't move. Laying eyes upon her was pure blasphemy.

He messed things up. Again.

"Sanji? Are you alright?" He saw the helm of her dress first. He wanted to dart away into the night and hide under a rock somewhere. But her hand rested on his shoulder and he turned to stone, his breath caught in his throat. Jun kneeled in front of him, but he kept his eyes on the floor. Warm wands cupped his face and forced him to look up. He could smell the salt from her dried up tears. "Are you okay?" He couldn't breathe.

He tried inhaling and nothing happened. The air was so disgusted with him it ran away. The air had all the right to. He was nothing. A scoundrel! His view shock and he realized someone was trying to get his attention.

As, she was beautiful! More so than the golden temptress on the dance floor. Jun had a different kind of charm. Her most irresistible feature was her tenderness, the gentleness with which she regarded the world. Even with him, even after he had caused her grief. Her kind eyes were red and sad, but she was clearly panicked. Her plump lips were moving, but he couldn't hear a word. Was she telling him to breathe? Why was she trying to help him? He was just dirt on the floor.

A sharp pain struck his left cheek. He was baffled for a moment, his head hanging awkwardly to the right. Silky hands cupped his face and a different kind of pain erupted in his chest when he met those sad brown eyes.

"You idiot! What are you doing? Are you having a panic attack? Hey?" She snapped her fingers in his face repeatedly. "You breathing again? What the hell came over you? You scared the living hell out of me. Stupid pervert!"

Tears burst out of his eyes again. A stupid pervert! That was him. He didn't deserve love let alone Jun's love. He didn't deserve a second of her time, not a touch of her skin, not a single note of her voice.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? There's a room full of busty women out there… You should rejoice!"

A room full of busty women, but he wanted the one out in the balcony.

He cursed himself internally for what he did next. He grabbed her, pulled her in his embrace, held her with his shaking arms and cried like a baby. Like the selfish perverted child he was.

"I'm sorry. I'm s-sorry. I'm sorry." He repeated the phrase like a mantra. He was ashamed by it. Not because he was begging, but because he had the nerve to do so. What kind on psychopath had he become? If he truly loved her he'd tell her to run away from him as fast and as far as she could. But he was an egotistic vermin. He still wanted her to be only his.

Jun was stiff in his arms as he kept apologizing and crying above her head. His tears fell and were lost in her mahogany locks. When she moved her hand he let out a strangled whimper and tightened his grip on her, as it that could have stopped her from teleporting. His face lowered and hid in her hair. He felt her let out a sigh.

"Sanji, look at me," Her voice was cold and demanding. He reluctantly loosened his arms, but his hands still held the velvet dress in iron grips. Their eyes met and he immediately looked away. Jun caught his chin between her slender fingers and turned his face back at her, long nails picking at his skin. Her brows were furrowed, her lips pressed in a straight, voluptuous line. She was, perhaps trying to look menacing, but all he could think about was how extremely kissable those lips were. It didn't help her either that her eyes were ever-warm and gentle.

"What do you want from me, Sanji?" She was peering into his soul with her gaze. She was so warm, trapped in his arms. It was making his mind foggy.

"All of you." A sad smile appeared on her face and he knew it was not a good enough answer.

"So you could do what exactly? Cheat on me with every other woman?" He shook his head frantically. He'd never chat on her if she was _his_ , would he? "Oh, is it just flirting then? It means nothing to you so if shouldn't mean to me either, right?" That was basically his only defence, but when she was the one uttering the words they seemed deplorable excuses. Tears welled up again in his eyes. "Stop crying, you moron! You're giving me a headache."

"I'm sorry…" He was still causing her distress. He should just die and save her the pain of being in his presence any longer. His face was still pinned in pace by her hand, but his eyes were free. So they moved to the darkness beyond the balcony.

"Do you know any other words?" Again, he only shook his head, as much as her grip permited. The silence that followed was excruciating. He was miserable. Yet his thoughts darted back and forth between wanting to look upon her and hiding in a hole in the ground. Her nails dug in his jaw, giving birth to all new fantasies. He caught a glimpse of her arms. They were covered with a thin black lace, the skin underneath dared him to touch it. He shivered, focusing hard not to cry or move his eyes on her. He felt her watch him. He was but a small perverted insect in her hands. Her nails pushed deeper and a sob escaped him before he could contain it.

"I'm sorry." A lone tear fell down his cheek. He lifted his hand to wipe it but was too slow. He felt hot breath on his skin before her lips touched him. His eyes widened, the music from the ball stopped. He could only hear the rapid beating of his heart. He felt her kiss the tear away, then move closer, licking his ear. Her voice rang in his head over the drumming noise.

"Can you promise to never do it again?" He snapped his head towards her. Was she serious? Was she just playing with him? Was it all just a dream? Did any of it really matter? She was so close; he could feel her every breath colliding with his skin.

"Never again!" The single word was more of a desperate plea than a statement. He saw her eyes drift down to his parted lips. He closed them and gulped. The next thing he knew, her hands were gripping at his hair, her lips moving roughly against his. It took him a moment to realize it was really happening, she was really kissing him. His arms wrapped around her again, his eyes closed as he answered the kiss with every fiber in his body. She bit his lip caused him to gasp. Smiling in the kiss, she slipped her tongue in his mouth where it danced with his. He was in heaven. Jun, for whatever reason, was kissing him and it was pure bliss. Her fingers passed through his hair, massaging his scalp. Her body was pressed to his, warmth engulfing him. Moist lips were pressed against his. She pulled away for air and he whimpered when hot breath hit his earlobe.

"Liar." His eyes widened in pure horror. The air around her distorted and he thought the dark night sky crashed on him as she disappeared. He felt a nauseating motion. All the light was sucked from the world and he was pushed backwards. He expected to fit the hard marble floor. Instead, his elbows dug in a soft mattress. His mattress. On his bed. In his room.

She was standing at the foot of the bed, her face covered in darkness. He heard her kick her shoes away, then leaned down to take his, discarding them and the socks on the floor. She straightened and Sanji could feel her eyes on him even if he couldn't see them. One zipping sound later, the black velvet fell off her body. He gulped at the sight before him. Jun's only undergarments consist of a lacy one piece that did little in hiding her skin.

Her hands reached the dark blue sheets and she slowly crawled up to him. He thought he was surely dreaming. Or he was dead and that was hell, for she was going to vanish just after she teased him good enough. But her legs straddled him, long fingers tracing his neck. She grabbed his necktie and pulled him savagely towards her, capturing his lips once more. He kissed back instantly, savoring her mouth pressed against his. His hands twitched, unsure of what to do. Should her hold her? Place his hands on her enticing thighs? Let her do whatever she wanted to him? Stop her before she did something she'd regret in the morning? Jun rocked her hips against him and his mind shut down.

His arms encased her in their embrace and nothing mattered anymore, except her body flushed against his. The whole world was black and white, only Jun was in vibrant hues. Wherever she touched him, she left trails of warm liquid shades on his skin. She was an artist, painting him with passion – his favorite color.

She sucked his tongue in her mouth and made it play with hers. Her agile hands had already pushed his coat off and pulled his shirt from his pants, her nails scrapping at his abs. His greedy hands were roaming her body, memorizing every valley, every curve and every edge. His cold heart was warmed again as her fingers traced the muscles on his chest.

Sanji only became aware that she had unbuttoned his shirt when it was pushed down his shoulders. Her mouth left his and she began leaving butterfly kisses along his jaw, then down his neck. Her teeth sank deep in the sensitive skin between his neck and shoulder. He loved it. He moaned loudly, his hands gripped what he found closest, which happened to be her ass. His head went to the side involuntarily, offering her more space. She sucked and kisses and licked all the skin from his ear to his collarbone, making it extremely tender. Sharp nails continued to drive him crazy, his muscles quivering in their wake. She pulled at his belt and in a moment of stupid lucidity his hand wrapped around her wrist.

"Why…?"

"Shh!" Jun's plump lips were pressed softly to the corner of his mouth in an instant. "Don't let me change my mind." With that, the reasoning behind his momentary uncertainty crumbled. His pants fell open and she guided his hips up so she could get rid of the annoying fabric. He found himself naked before her, not entirely sure, but not really carrying, how she also took off his boxers in such a swift movement.

He saw the hunger in her eyes, the lust that darkened her doe-like eyes. She came back to him, one knee standing on either side of him. She took his hands and guided them: starting from her thighs, up the curve of her hips, past the perky nipples he felt under the thin. With his hands, she pushed the straps of the one pieced suit. Sanji shivered when h realized she was inviting him to undress her of her final garment. He noticed his hands trembling slightly as he reached to untie the ribbons on her sides, releasing her from the black lace.

Even in the low light, Jun's creamy skin made his mouth go dry. Without much thought, he pulled her closer and attacked her breasts. They were perfect! The contrast between her silky skin and the hardened nipples was insanely rousing. He enjoyed sweeping his tongue over the sensitive bud. Jun's back was arched; her chest struck forward, pushing closer to Sanji. Her hips were rocking back and forth, her core rubbing against his impatient cock. She was teasing him and he was a sucker for it.

Her hands would skim over his chest, get dangerously close to his lower regions, then pull back up. Soft, barely audible moans were escaping her, but it was all Sanji could hear. It was music to his heart, fuel to his lust. He bit down harder on her nipple and Jun pressed harder against his throbbing member in response. Their eyes met. His heart was beating so fast it made him dizzy. He could see her flushed cheeks, her panting mouth.

She bit her lip as her fingers wrapped around his staff, her hips rose for a moment before plunging down. His forehead rested on her chest, just above her breast, her breath being knocked out of his lungs. His cock was buried deep inside of Jun! Her arms went around his neck, fingers clenched in his hair. His own grabby limbs found their way on her back, a ravenous yearning to keep her close taking complete control of him.

She started slowly, lifting her hips and diving back down, taking his entire length. Her pace quickened gradually, as did their breaths. His ravening mouth found a spot on her shoulder and sucked on it, teeth grazing gently on the skin. He couldn't have enough of her. His fingers, sprayed on her back, pulled her in, wanting her even closer. Closer, still.

The rhythm was hypnotic, the sound of flesh hitting flesh – exhilarating. Jun was ramming up and down, her moans loud in his ears, like a siren's song. Sanji parted his mouth from her skin, lifting his eyes to look at her.

She was the embodiment of a true goddess. In the dim moonlight, with her head slightly bent forward, black locks sticking with sweat to her radiating skin, she was magnificent. Her half-lidded eyes met his and he saw the corners of her lips curve up. She picked up the pace, groaning when he also thrust his hips upward, and leaned her head closer.

She kissed him once more and he came undone.

Pleasure expanded in him. His entire body convulsed as the moist walls around his cock constricted, sucking him dry. She bit hard on his lip, and moaned something, the sound muffled by his mouth. She stopped rolling her hips and rested her forehead on his. They were both still breathing heavily when Sanji untangled their limbs and settled under the covers, her head on his chest. His hand, still in need to feel her skin, traveled up and down her arm. He absently placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Sanji…" The way Jun purred his name was spellbinding. He was more convinced by the second that he'd been saying it wrong his entire life. The single person in the world that pronounced it right was Jun. He cradled her closely and kissed her hair, whispering trough the black tassels.

"I'll never let go of you again." He was lulled to sleep by the sound of her beating heart and the delightful feeling of her body next to his. As he was drifting to sleep he could've sworn he heard her mutter a single word.

"Liar."

* * *

"And when you appear all the rivers sound in my body,

bells shake the sky and a hymn fills the world."

\- Pablo Neruda

* * *

*blush* Ahem!

This ended being lot longer 'cause it went places I didn't foresee... [ like the woman in the golden dress... she was not supposed to happen... but then I wrote her and she did... O.O ]

So... what do you think? :)

I tried reading the chapter again after I finished it... but it's almost 5 am... typos might have been missed... sorry :(

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I'm dying to give you a glimpse of the **next** and _theoretically_ **last chapter**... I don't know if you guys will like it *goes to bed before spoils the ending*


	13. Chapter 13

I don't know why I feel like apologising for the last chapter... But in my defence, when I first made the layout of the story, the woman Sanji kissed at the ball was supposed to actually be Jun. Actually Jun was supposed to be the only woman he noticed there... But then I thought 'No, that's out of character' as if he'd been so 'in character' in rest of the story... :)))

I'm sincerely sorry! *bows head*

 **Later edit:** OMG LiSYi, thanks a lot for pointing it out. I scanned the first chapter for her name but I must have missed it *airhead* I changed her name in the first chapter so it would match the one here. *hugs*

Anyways... here's the last epilogue-esque chapter.

 **Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

"If a soft breeze and a single spark can set a landscape on fire…

imagine what the wild breath of your soul could do with this flickering heart."

-Jonny Ox

* * *

Saying that the past months had been bliss was an understatement. Sanji couldn't remember a time when he was happier. The feeling came close to the time he joined the Straw Hats, but it was somehow different. It soothed other parts of his soul. On one hand, there was the sense of belonging the crew offered him. On the other, the love Jun was showering him with, making him feel, needed, craved.

He remembered waking up the day after the ball thinking it had all been another dream of his, only to discover Jun sleeping soundlessly in his arms. He almost squealed, but refrained himself so he wouldn't startle her. He must have stared at her for hours, mesmerized by her peaceful face, her messy hair all over his pillows.

What had he done to deserve her?

It was a question he asked himself every waking hour. Except for those moments when she made him loose all of his senses, when she wrapped him in her world of love and acceptance. But when she was asleep besides him, looking all innocent and frail, he was scared. Frightened he might hurt her again. Terrified that one day when he opened his eyes she wouldn't be there anymore. When he couldn't take it anymore he asked her as they were laying in her bed, her fingers caressing his chest.

"Why?"

"Why what?" She smiled sweetly at him and he realised she already knew what he was talking about. But she liked to tease him with every word and every subject. There was a playfulness in her voice that always made him smile in return. Not that day, though.

"Why give yourself to me? Why trust me? Why offer me another chance?" He way past his second chance, he was well aware of that. So _why_? The question was nagging at his thoughts, paralyzing him with fear at night.

"Hmm. Because love is blind? 'Better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all' and all that jazz?"

"You decided it based on a quote?"

"It started with the quote, but it went past it. I thought about leaving, I really din." His arms tightened around her out of instinct and her smile widened. "I would have regretted it if I left. I would have always asked myself _'what if'_? I would have wondered if I shouldn't have played with your feelings in the beginning, if I should've tried harder, if you would have been as amazing a lover as you've proven me to be." She leaned closer and kissed the top on his nose.

It was true, Sanji did try to make it up to her. He served her breakfast in bed every morning, was attentive to her every whim, made her happy when she was feeling down and took extra special care to kiss every patch of skin that covered her body. He was one elevated heartbeat away from composing a sonnet in her honor.

He was happy.

Waking up to Jun's kisses, being lulled to sleep by the circled she'd draw on his arms with her tender fingers, was all more than he had ever hoped. It was easy for him to claim he was the luckiest man alive. He wanted to shout his love for her from the top of the world. He wanted the first dish he'll prepare after he found the All Blue would be for her and her alone!

He was in love over his head and wasn't ashamed to say it.

Not once had his mind traveled to other women. He realized that as long as Jun was in his arms he needed nothing else. No busty temptress would steal his eyes away from his goddess. No siren's gong would keep him from hearing her mellifluous giggles or her ardent moans. He recalled another day, early in morning, when they were walking on the beach. The sun danced in her raven hair making it look like dark fire. She was playing with her feet in the water, running away from the waves. The mischievous smile she gave him before pulling him down in the water was carved on his memory, the memory forever plating itself on the back of his eyes.

He could still perfectly see her sun-kissed face, her dripping wet clothes, that heart-warming smile and those irresistible soul-wrecking eyes. He couldn't help himself any longer.

"I love you."

"I know." Her answer, although reassuring to some degree, confused him.

"Why did you call me a liar then?" She caressed his face, moving some of his wet out of his eyes.

"I agreed to you loving me. Never said you wouldn't go chasing after other skirts…" He opened his mouth to deny, but it closed back on its own. He repeated the gesture a few times, looking like a gapping fish. Which was kind of ironic, since they were in the water on the oceanfront.

Why did she give him a chance if she thought he'd cheat on her? More importantly, was he capable of such an act? Could he really betray her like that? The one person in the world who made his heart sing? The person he didn't want to live a second apart? Could he do that to her? He was shaking like a leaf as he was thinking of such an act of madness. He should stop being such a flirt! He should at least try harder! No, not should, He would do it! With all his will and heart and soul, he would give his best. Not for him, but for Jun. She deserved better, so he would become someone better. The best! As if reading his mind, Jun continued talking.

"Plus, I think I have a solution."

"A solution?"

"It's more of a punishment really." His face must have gone as white as snow because she giggled like a schoolgirl. "See, for every single time you go around and screw with other women, I shall do the same."

"What?"

"And ok, I get it, you want to be a gentleman and bow and take their hand and kiss it. I could _try_ and get over that." Her face darkened, her hand found its way in his hair and jabbed his head backwards, hitting the seashells and the sand. He was forced to look directly into her eyes. "But if I ever find out you did anything more…"

The thought left him horror-stricken. _His_ Jun in the arms of another man? He'd kill the bastard before he had the chance to even look her way. But he wasn't going to cheat. He was a reformed man, a gentleman that found the righteous way. And if Jun was with him there wasn't even the slightest chance he'd even consider looking at another woman.

But Jun was leaving.

He knew that for a couple of weeks. He remembered her joking around, saying she had already prolonged her stay on Momiro Island, claiming that if it wasn't for Sanji, she would have left a month or two after she first arrived. That would have been more than one year ago.

It was time for her to go back to her life. She was going after the scum that sold her crew out. She hadn't been very specific with the details, the subject clearly still bringing her grief, but he got the most important facts: some guy they all trusted turned them in to the marines in exchange for the bounties and his freedom. He remembered vaguely reading about a similar case a few years before joining Luffy and wondered if it was the same guy. Besides the fact that he understood her need to avenge her crew, the guy was making things difficult for pirates everywhere. Just about anyone could pose as a pirate, gain your trust, then sell you out for the reward. The scum and those like him were creating some serious trust-issues in the pirate world.

She was also leaving _for_ him. He had less than half a year to finish his training and master the Okama Kenpo Style and the Attack Cuisine. In the short time he spent together with his beloved Jun, he hadn't beaten a single master. He had 8 more to go. He still needed to learn 8 recipes. It sounded easy, but the last masters were putting up one hell of a fight.

He intended to work harder, but the fact that he knew she was leaving also made him want to spend every second of his time with her. His skipped his training, both alone and with the cross-dressers, his head was in the clouds as the recipe was being explained to him and he couldn't focus enough to beat the current Mater. He heart was screaming at him to get his ass back to Jun, his mind feed him images of her waiting for him to return.

He never expected for the 3 weeks to pass so quickly. It felt as if one moment her naked body was entangled with his, the next he was watching her on the deck of a ship, talking with the cross-dressers that were escorting her to nearest big island. She insisted she could teleport her way there, but the transvestites insisted they had way to get supplies. The whole ordeal made her stay one extra day and Sanji thanked all the Gods he could name for those 24 hours of heaven.

She turned her head towards him and his heart stopped. The wind was blowing around the loose strands of her hair and her loose white blouse. It was one of the few moments when he saw her wearing pants: long tight blue garments that highlighted every curve. He saw her smiling from far on the docks where he was standing. In a fraction of a second she was before him, their noses almost touching.

His arms caught her in a tight embrace. He felt his pulse rising, a hollowing panic growing inside his very soul.

Was she really going away?

He kissed the top of her head repeatedly. His arms were snakes around her frame and he wasn't planning on releasing her any time soon. She was his soul mate, he was sure of it. He'd die without her, whiter away sad and alone, he was convinced of it. She was rubbing his back, trying to calm him down, but it was only making him miss her already. She pushed her head away to look at him and whispered lovingly.

"Sanji, you have to let go…"

"But I promised I would never."

"Don't worry, love, we'll see each other again." Jun pulled at him, and he reluctantly loosed his grip. She took his hand and placed a piece of paper in it, folding his fingers so the wind wouldn't blow it away.

"Vivre card."

"I can always find you." She kissed him and it took him all his self-restraint not to shackle her in his arms again. The thought of running away with her briefly crossed his mind before he remembered he had to finish his training and get back to his crew. "Don't lose it!"She punched him in his arm playfully when she pulled away.

"It's my most prized possession." He'd keep it close to his heart, a sad replacement of her warmth.

The sailors were shouting for her and she let go of him to wave at them, signaling she was coming to them in just a moment. He wanted to fall on his knees and bed her to come find him as soon as she could, but his attention was caught as she started to search frantically through her bag.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Iva-sama found this. I thought you should have it since I have one of you."

Jun stuck her tongue out at him, her cheeks tainted with a shade of red, and handed him an old Wanted Poster. It was Jun's, from before she was imprisoned in Impel Down, from the time she was part of the Syzygy Pirates. "Jumper" Jun Hamasaki, bounty of 70,000,000, wanted dead or alive. She looked so young! She must have been barely sixteen, with short hair that reached only her shoulders. But most remarkable fact that registered in Sanji's brain was that she had always been beautiful, even at such an early age. _Always_ had been female!

"I'm such an idiot..."

"Meh, it's part of your charm." She kissed him again and he was sure that kiss would burn on his lips until he saw her again.

* * *

"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close."

\- Pablo Neruda

* * *

First of all, she was always supposed to leave, since the moment this sorry was born in my head...

Second, I had an idea a few chapters back. Jun could pop up in several places on the Straw Hats journey.

Like for a first next chapter, Sanji could be mad 'cause no one in the crew believed him Jun was real. And then one day *poof* she was on their ship.

And then have some fun with the Punk Hazard body-switching episode... things like that.

But I don't know. I'm marking this as **Complete** for the moment. *this feels so nice*

If more chapters are to come, for those of you reading the manga, they won't until I freaking find out where Sanji is and what is happening to him. And if you're not reading the manga... you should. It's great!

Anyways

Thank you all for taking your time and reading my story. I love every and each of you who clicked favourite/follow and reviewed [ even if I was sometimes saddened by them reviews. Just saying :)) * still love you* ].

 **Wish you guys all the best!** *Hugs  & Kisses*


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